After the rain

Tears in the rain

  'Let's walk through the rain together, just you and I.'

   That's what  Skye said years ago.

  It is raining, yet there is strong sunlight amidst the rain. Honestly it doesn't make any sense.

  But regardless of our circumstances, I know we will come out victorious together. That is the solution. Not to fight each other, but to help each other. In the end we were all part of the same institution, the enemy was really the other schools. 

  Actually that was incorrect, I corrected Daniel.

  In the end what we needed to do was to find balance between the two. We needed to be competitive, but not to the extent that it compromised our friendships.

  And to find it, was to grow up. Maturity was knowing when to accept your circumstances and move on, and when to push yourself, to push society, for more.

  'I guess we aren't there yet,' Jenni chuckled as we stood outside the hall. 'But let's enjoy our youth!'

Seconds later, we were seated in front of our desks in the hall. With a thick stack of stapled papers on each desk.

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  There are a thousand molecules speeding around the open space of the corridor. 

  No, actually a quadrillion.

  No, it's more than that.

  There are more atoms than people. But aren't atoms like people.

  We were seated in a class, vibrating about our fixed places like atoms in a solid. The teacher was a random mobile electron moving about. 

  Each atom was moving at a different speed. Some faster than others. Some more vigorous than others. Some had more energy than others.

  The Teacher's voice resonated throughout the room. It echoed down the hallway like a resounding battle cry.

  The exams were mere  indicators of our performance in the national exams at the end of the year. The end had not yet come. But that meant that we had some hope. Because the verdict had not yet been passed. Our hope, which drives us and propels is to live and fight, has not died. It is always there, as long as here is life.

  No one hopes for something they already have. The national exams were not even here yet. It's not over.

   Drip.

   Drip.

   Drip.

   The class was empty. The sounds of splashing water shook my ears. 

  The shape of someone I knew.

  The shadow of a broken soul.

  Silent tears I never heard.

  She was still, seated in the corner, crawling like a shatter soul. 

  Hello Skye.

  'Are you alright?'

  That statement shattered the silence that swallowed the classroom. She stood up, and faced me. The constant drumming of the rain seemed to rhyme with her frame of mind. We just looked at each other. Her eyes seemed to melt into mine. In them was sadness. And the clarity of the sky.

  'I forgot to thank you for your help, thanks to it I passed econs.'

  Her voice was crisp. She stood up and swiftly walked passed me, gliding like an angel across the classroom.

  'Wait!'

  Startled, she turned to face me. I took a few steps forward. 

  Standing centimeters apart, I took out a piece of tissue and handed it to her. She took it and wiped her tears. When they dried up, it was still raining outside. It  went on for hours.

  When she was done, she crushed it and placed it in her pocket. She smiled, radiant like the sun, it seemed to dry the river of tears that flowed down her face. She looked so beautiful like this, I wanted to tell her but it would be embarrassing for both of us.

  Actually there were many things I wanted to tell her at that time. From elaborating on economic theories to the mystery of her eyes that pulled me in. There were just so many things, as many as the next mover of atoms on this planet. But I failed to recognize them. This failure resulted in my inability to say anything.

  She glowed with inner and outer beauty, it was amazing. Would someone this perfect even exist in such a distorted world. An untainted soul, unfazed by the fire and pressure of the world, like a diamond refined by pressure.

  I hadn't even noticed that she was already carrying her bag. 

  'I'm going home, thanks Len,' she said as she prepared to leave.

  I quickly grabbed my bag ran to the doorway where she was about to leave. 

  'Do you have an umbrella?'

  She searched her bag.

  No.

  'We could share one.'

  Under the same black umbrella we walked under the crying sky. We walked across the field littered with baseballs, the track where the trackers were training. She walked slowly and I adjusted my pace to hers, slowly the rain sank into our hearts, our heartbeats echoing the monotone rhythm of the rain.

  I could not see the sun in the grey sky, but I could see its light. I could feel the warmth of its heat and presence. And the stars, although they could not be seen, I knew they were there, and in the dead of the night, they would come to guide us.

  'Feels nostalgic. Have we done this before?'

  We walked through the main gate and down the pavement, until we reached the train station.

  'My house is on the other side.'

  'Take my umbrella, you need it more than I do.'

  'Why?'

  'You've been shivering and sneezing.'

  With that, we parted.

  It was the least I could do for a friend. To repay her kindness years ago. In a sense, it was an opportunity for me. What left me puzzled was the fact that no one noticed her sadness. Not the kind hearted Daniel, not her best friend Jenni nor her admirer Luke. It was me. Why was it me?

  By process of elimination

  Jenni and Luke had training.

  Daniel went home early to study.

  And what was I doing? I was in charge of the chess club that day, club activities ended early so I came to class at the right time.

  I walked out of the train station and turned left. Walked down the street where some troublemakers were drinking alcohol in their school uniform. I ignored their cat calling and continued walking. Until I reached a junction and turned right.

  The rain gradually reduced to a tiny drizzle as I sat at my desk doing work. The city moved just as fast in the rain. It did not diminish their footsteps of their voices. Even the lights, although refracted, still shone and made their mark in the rain.

  Nothing lasts forever. Neither tears nor rain.