No One Knows (Sequel to 16) (Completed)

Chapter 5: The Strains of Being Lonely

Annabel's POV

"Billie?" 

My voice sounded eerie and as if it didn't belong to me. It was dark, my eyes barely making out the familiar silhouettes of my bedroom furniture and walls. I shifted my legs and at once sensed something was wrong; Private Ale was not there, his spot on the bed still warm and leaving an indentation on the sheets. 

I'm sure I heard it, those distinct three knocks at the window. My mind was still foggy from sleep, as I stumbled out of bed and across the room. The lone streetlamp near our front lawn illuminated a quiet sidewalk, the tree in front of me empty of any strange boys. I sighed heavily, making my way back to the sanctuary of my blankets when I nearly tripped over the recently-missing Private Ale. He looked up at me, ears perked, then went back to chewing on something. I knelt down and squinted in the gloom. One of those dog biscuits. It was there that I found a small package under the window sill, wrapped in brown paper and tied with bright green ribbon.

Feeling stranger and stranger by the second, I opened it quickly. Out spilled a small bundle of papers, a pair of underwear and 3 lilacs tied into a little bouquet. I smiled as I read the note attached on the string of the flowers:

hey bells, 

i put this weirdness down to me not being able to sleep. i know it's kinda creepy to be leaving things at your window and all but yeah i guess i've always been a fuckwit so i apologise. enclosed are jeremy's underwear (clean, don't worry, i took that upon myself to ensure) and some flowers to make this seem a little less repulsive and some lyrics. i don't know what to do with them yet, but i wanted you to be the first one to read them. i don't know. fuck me. sorry for being an asshole and not doing our usual smoke behind the dumpsters between 5th and 6th period. things have been weird. i wanna see you soon okay? i don't know. don't hate me.

bj

ps. green day's at gilman saturday night

I couldn't help but clutch the lilacs tight as I finished reading, a big stupid grin on my face. Billie had been strangely aloof for the last week or so. Not Mike or Tré, they had been as present as ever at school, Tré slipping weed into my locker when he thought I was pissed at him and Mike pulling song after song out of that busted old bass in music. Billie I had only seen in the hallways a few times, watching him change direction as soon as he saw me. It was starting to get me a bit concerned. 

I opened the bundle of papers. They were stained with that familiar, unruly hand.

Staring out of my window, watching the cars go rolling by
All my friends are gone... I've got nothing to do
So I sit here patiently watching the clock tick so slowly

Gotta get away or my brains will explode

Give me something to do to kill some time
Take me to that place that I call home
Take away the strains of being lonely

Take me to the tracks at Christie Road

See the hills from afar standing on my beat up car
The sun went down and the night fills the sky
Now I feel like me once again as the train comes rolling in

Smoked my boredom gone, slapped my brains up so high

Give me something to do to kill some time
Take me to that place that I call home
Take away the strains of being lonely

Take me to the tracks at Christie Road

I read it over so many times. My heart was pounding hard in my chest as I read by flashlight underneath the blankets. He had never opened himself up like this. Songs were precious to him, and I knew that even Mike and Tré had a hard time drawing him out to share them sometimes. 

I folded the papers carefully and held them to my chest, staring at my ceiling. I couldn't close my eyes without seeing him. Unconscious amongst the purple flowers, on the train tracks. Holding me to him in his bed, so tired and just trying to focus on the scent of his skin. Smoking between classes, jumping like a lunatic at Gilman, singing Bowie in the car, playing guitar absent-mindedly and humming away, swing-dancing to Elvis, climbing up to my window, that smile, those eyes, how he kissed me...

I could only grasp Christie Road tighter as I hoped this overwhelming wave would pass. I fell asleep not sure if it had.

......

A/N hey being a broken record i'm sorry for not uploading! this chapter is just a bit of fluff but believe me some MAJOR shit to go down soon! thanks for reading!!!