What is it about you that
makes me completely lose it?
I think at this point it's more
my fault than it is yours.
You made your choice and
pushed me away and yet...
Maybe I can't accept it.
Maybe I think you're wrong.
I'm still, somehow, hoping
that you'll see things my way
and want me again. But why
in the hell would I want someone
who continually pushes me away
and enrages me; who makes
everything more confusing and
makes me want to change
just so that you'll look at me
for more than a fleeting minute.
I want to hate you because
hating you is easier than
the heartache I get from
simple amiable conversation;
as if suddenly I'm fine and I
don't care that you're killing me.
No, I should hate you.
I should hate that you
don't seem to care and
that you're ok without me
while I'm struggling to
avoid you to stay sane.
Why can't you be less confusing?
Why can't I understand you?
I just...just need something -
anything - so I know why
you keep pushing me away
and take my sanity with you.
