Ultraviolence

I know what you really want baby

2nd January 2018

Amelia

Cautiously, I stare at him as I sit silently, trying to think of a way out. Slowly, He turned the grill with one hand, its soft ticking broke through the silence. With the other hand he opened the door to the freezer and opened a pack of sausages. He never once looked back at me while the grill spat lava in his direction.

I was panicking but I knew I had to stay still to prevent any struggle or confrontation, so I internalised it. The wait was agony as I saw the sausages frying, spitting out in anger like a hostile viper. I knew that any creak, any scrape, or any groan from the chair would mean his piercing eyes would assault me. I try to stay silent.

I try to stay obedient.

I can still feel my arms burning in pain from before, purple bruises left like a brand.
I can't take this.
How long has he been doing this?
How long has he been planning?
I can't cope.
What if I'm not his first?
What if  no one notices I'm gone?

It's as if everyone I ever knew, every instinct I ever had was screaming at me, I needed to run as fast as I can away from this house. Away from this madness, away from the devil and every inferno that followed him.

Sizzle

Holding the spatula like a weapon, he flipped the meat onto a large white plate, grease filled the edges of the plate like a poison stream. I flinched as he walked over to me, his hand caressing my cheek. staring at the plate he placed in front of me, my lungs and heart racing. The sound of a silver knife and fork spread through my bones as it scratched the plate. I waited until the two sausages were cut into thick, round circles.

"Eat up, my love."

My fingers twitched as he placed a fork in my hand, already containing a pieceof meat in its four spikes. Terrified, I sat staring at it, its juices dripping along the thin handle until it was stopped by my nimble hands. I brought the slice to my mouth, it's smell penetrated my senses as it rested on my lips. I opened my mouth, its taste spread across my tongue like a disease. I tried to swallow but it just sat there impatiently, caged between my teeth. Before I could understand what I was doing I spat it out into the pure white plate. I quickly realised, when Ezequiel's eyes grew dark, that that was the wrong decision.

Ezequiel suddenly picked up several slices of sausages in his hand and pushed them into my mouth. I strained as he forced his hand over my mouth and kept it there as I struggled to escape his grasp. He held my whole body down with his own, like a boa constrictor strangling it's prey.

"I'm not going to let you go until you eat."

His piercing blue eyes, crunched up as if he was looking for something, stared into my patient brown ones as wide as the moon and stars surrounding them. My chest rose and fell as the food slid down the back of my throat. I begin to gag, the food moving from the back of my throat to my mouth and back to my throat again. I stayed like that for a while, him on top of me refusing to move, the food in my mouth refusing to be eaten.

I when I could finally work up the courage, I managed to force the food down my throat. He then let out a sigh of relief, as if me not eating was torturing him in some way.

"Finally." He breathed, his lips brushing my ears as he did so.

Gently, I pushed him off of me, attempting not to spark anything inside him. holding my hands as he stood up, he tugged me until I stood as well, parallel to him. He grabbed my hands once again and brushed his fingers through my hair, with each strand he would curl around his fingers before letting them fall to my shoulders. He brought those fingers to my mouth and pushed past my lips yet still refused to go past my teeth as if my tongue was some sacred ground that he dare not enter.

"Come Amelia, I have something to show you." He grinned, filled with some sadistic sense of confidence.

He led me through the corridors of his mansion, gradually picking up the pace with each door we went through as if he was growing impatient. His grip on my hand grew tighter as he started running towards the last door on the end of the last corridor opposite to us. Without hesitation he opened the dark oak door to reveal a snow white room, containing only a tripod and the camera that was attached to it.

Ezequiel entered the room, beckoning for me to follow, the heels of my shoes echoed across the large room.

"Stand in front of the camera."

Timidly, I made my way to the centre of the room where the camera aimed. My eyes wondering to avoid his gaze, my breathing slowly settled to a steady pace whilst he got his camera ready.

Flash

"Now take of your night gown."

My hands shook as I brought them to lace around my neck. I made deep breaths to try and distract myself from his penetrating glare.

"No! Look happy, look pretty. It's important."

I closed my eyes and focused, trying to force myself to be happy. Trying to find something, some part of my messed up live I could cherish.

Breathe in breathe out
Breathe in

Then, I found some thing. I imagined Nina's hands were mine, hers were the hands that were slowly undoing my lace.

Flash

Hers were the hands that held the lace in my hands and let it fall to my feet.

Flash

Hers were the hands that pulled the thin white gown over my torso.

Flash

And hers were the hands that glided its way down my naked body.

Flash

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