Funny School Stories {Second Edition}

Chapter Fourteen (Final)

A/N

Technically this should be Chapter Thirteen but since thirteen is unlucky I don't want to end this book that way. Anyway, on with the stories! 

Puns

There is one girl in my school who is bisexual and proud. One day, at the end of science class, she was lying on he ground on her back.

"Um, what are you doing?" I asked her.

"There's been a homo-cide!" She replied, laughing at her own joke.

I laughed too, along with everyone else within earshot. 

The Candy Black Market

This is one of my favourite school memories so far.

The last two or three weeks of school, a small handful of us who sat at the back of the room in science class, would just pig out on candy during the class.

There was one girl, who we'll call The Candy Dealer (Actual candy not drugs) myself, a girl we'll call Lisa and two boys who we'll call John and Steve.

Basically, The Candy Dealer had a pencil case full of candy that she started bringing to science the last few weeks of school.

She would give us candy if we gave her something to trade.

I always have gum during school, and since it was almost the end of the year, I had quite a bit of extra pieces left, so I would trade The Candy Dealer gum for chocolate or suckers.

The stupid science teacher never caught on, except once when John was enjoying a ring pop that Lisa had given him.

"John, put that away please. You can't eat candy in class."

When he said that, I immediately shoved the rest of the chocolate I was eating in my mouth and hid the wrapper under my textbook, while The Candy Dealer zipped up her extra pencil case and hid it under her desk.

John wrapped up the ring pop but continued to lick it every time the teacher wasn't looking.

One day, John brought a bunch of suckers and he wouldn't give me one. I managed to convince him into holding one out and said he could move it out of my reach and I would try to grab it before he could. He agreed, and I ended up being too fast for him, and snatched the sucker, immediately taking the wrapper off and licking it. triumphantly.

This whole candy thing is a memory that I will probably carry with me for the rest of my life.

It made me look forward to science, something I had never done before. 

Salt Junkies?

In art class, sometime close to the end of the school year, our teacher was showing us a movie. It wasn't all fun and games though because we did have to answer questions in a booklet while we watched it. Anyway, the teacher had made bags of popcorn for everyone in the class, and had a thing of salt. (Not a salt shaker but like, a thingy. Idk what's it called. A bottle? Idk, a salt thingy! You know!) 

Everyone else was done with the salt, so Meagan, Jade, and I ended up with it because we were the last people to have it.

The popcorn was really dry, so the three of us kept shaking more salt into our bags, and shaking them up in the hopes that it would mix around. 

When we were done eating our popcorn, we each had a huge pile of salt at the bottom of our bags, despite all the shaking. 

Meagan and Jade began eating the salt at the bottoms of their bags, pouring some into their hands and dumping it into their mouths, or just flat out tipping their bag into their mouths. I did the same with my bag, but I can't eat too much salt, so I gave the rest to the two of them to share. 

"We're salt junkies!" Meagan exclaimed, laughing quietly. 

The Elephanté Returns

One day, I was wearing my favourite black sweater. (I love it so much that once when it was starting to get small, I sat on the ends of the sleeves and the bottom of the sweater to stretch it out)

I was in a class, I don't remember which one, but I remember I didn't have any friends in that class.

I was bored, so I tucked my hand inside the sweater sleeve, and put it by my mouth, opening and shutting my hand, with the sweater sleeve completely covering it.

When you're bored in class and you're an elephant

I thought to myself, trying not to laugh. I immediately wanted to share this with Meagan, since we have a similar sense of humour, so after school when we were in the library together, I reenacted it, asking her to record me doing it.

"When you're bored in class and you're an elephant." I said, doing the hand-in-sweater motion again.

"When you're bored in class and you're an elephant with two trunks!" I said, cracking up while doing the same motion but with both hands at the same time.

The joke was later modified to have a third phrase, "When you're bored in class and you're an elephant with a markistache!"

A markistache is what I call Markiplier's trademark pink moustache.

The "elephant with a markistache" thing originated from when I had drawn a huge pink moustache on the palm of my hand, and was recreating the "bored in class and you're an elephant" thing, when I realized I could add something new.

This whole elephant-sweater-thing became an inside joke between Meagan and I, one that we still sometimes quote to this day.

I still have the original video!

A/N

Thanks for reading Funny School Stories Second Edition! I appreciate all of the reads and support I have gotten on both this one and the first one! 

I hope you enjoyed this final chapter and if you want more, be sure to check out Funny School Stories Third Edition! 

Thank you guys so much and I'll see you when I see you okie byeee!!