I'm Kurt Hummel and this is my senior year

08 It will always be him

It will always be him

'Kurt! Please! What use has it to quit Glee Club? Come back!' begged Mercedes while she was trying hard to stop me from walking way. It's an understatement when you see I avoided her the past week. 'We need you!' 'Nobody needs me' I mumbled. 'We do! Who battles Rachel for the solos now?' 'I don't care' I said. I couldn't care less. 'White boy you listen -' started Mercedes but was cut off when my phone buzzed.

Kurt! Please let us talk!

I love you!

B

Tears started to form in my eyes. Every day he texted me. Always the same text...and I always ignored them. I feared if I'd texted him back Karofsky would somehow find out and would hurt Blaine again. This fear killed me every single day.

'You need to talk to him you know. By the way I still don't get why you broke up with him' said Mercedes softly. I hadn't noticed she'd been reading along. 'He lives with his brother now, I can't and don't want to! And I told you! We grew apart' I had made up this lame excuse when the others found out I broke up with him.

'But he lived with you.' I was sure Mercedes was not buying any of it. 'Just...Just...can't you just leave me alone?' I yelled at her. I quickly deleted his text and walked away from her before she could see that I was trying hard not to break down. 'He deserves it!' She shouted after me.

I rushed into the nearest classroom and closed the door. I couldn't hold this up any longer.

'My unicorn is back!' Suddenly somebody called out. I looked up and saw I was in the choir room. Damn.

Brittany ran to me and hugged me excited. 'I told Lord Tubbington you would come back but he didn't believe me' she grinned at me. 'I...I...' I stuttered. 'What do you want Kurt?' Mike came up behind Brittany, looking at me with a cold expression. He and Brittany were the only ones in the room. 'So?' Mike said sternly. I knew he was Blaine's best friend ever since they performed together but I never thought he would be so disparaging.

'I was just leaving' I said and turned around. 'No! You can't go!' Brittany said disappointed. I ignored her and walked to the door but before I got out I stooped and asked 'How is he?' 'You mean Blaine?' I winced as I heard his name. 'If you wanna know how your ex-boyfriend is you have to speak with Blaine himself.' Mike said. His words were like somebody drove a knife into my heart.

I pressed my lips together and simply nodded. I walked out but before I closed the door I heard Mike saying 'Blaine needs you Kurt.' 'I need him too! I need him to just hold me and tell me it's gonna be alright!' I wanted to scream but I simply shut the door and wanted to go to class but was stopped by four football players. One of them was Azimio, the others I didn't know. I closed my eyes tight expecting the cold of a slushie to hit me but to my surprise Azimio said 'You better go to the locker room. Karofsky is looking for you fairy.' I felt my hands were starting to shake. Couldn't he just leave me alone?

The football players simply left without saying more.

I leaned against the lockers. Not only my hands were shaking now, my whole body was. Sobs started to make their way up my throat but I forced them back down.

I felt so hopeless. Like I was falling into darkness without any hold.

'I have no choice' I thought lousy and made my way slowly to the locker room.

'What do you want Karofsky?' I said as I pushed the door open but hesitated as I saw that nobody was there. I walked inside but stopped looking around. No sign of Karofsky anywhere. 'Maybe Azimio messed with me.' Shaking my head, I turned around and gasped. Karofsky was standing so close to me that I could feel his breath on my face. I jerked away quickly, almost falling over a bench. My heartbeat quickened and I could hardly breathe. I cleared my throat a few times before I brought something out. 'What do you want?' Karofsky looked at me with...what? Was that affection in his eyes? No, this could not be. 'You came' Karofsky simply said. 'Tell me what do you want!' I said becoming impatient. Timidly Karofsky said 'Are you ok?' 'What' I exhaled. Was this a new kind of bullying? First force your victim to break up with the love of his life then be nice to him? Not with me. 'I go now' I said but before I could move Karofsky revealed a bunch of red roses.

My jaw dropped. 'I think...I like you' I heard Karofsky say.

This was it. It was like somebody switched something inside of me. All the anger and hurt busted out. 'You think you like me?' I screamed at him. 'Is that why you hurt Blaine?' Karofsky dropped the flowers and I saw a flash of anger in his eyes but I didn't care. 'You think in making me break up with him I would want to be with you?' I was closing the space between us again and screamed in his face. 'I will always love Blaine. It will always be him. I hate you Karofsky. You are nothing less than a basta-' Bam! I felt a hot sharp sting. I was sent backwards falling over the bench and hitting my head at something. My vision started to blur and I had to blink a few times to see a little clearer.

A man in black was standing protectively over me and pushed Karofsky away from me. I didn't really care who the man was or how he had come here. I was just glad he'd saved me.

I closed my eyes again because my head was starting to spin.

Suddenly the man was next to me and slowly helped me up. I winced in pain. 'Sshh. It's ok Kurt. He's gone' said the man with a familiar voice. I tried to focus my vision and was face to face with a man I knew quite well.

'Cooper?'

'You should see a doctor' said Cooper a few minutes after we had sat down in the auditorium. He had helped me get out of the locker room but I needed to sit down. 'I'm fine' I said 'just need painkillers.' Cooper nodded and silence fell upon us for some time.

I was the one who broke it again. 'So..why are you here?' 'To talk you to senses' admitted Cooper 'But now...' He looked at me with sympathy. 'Is it true?' 'What?' I asked trying to keep my voice controlled. I wondered how much he had heard before he'd saved me. 'Is it true you broke up with my brother because this guy made you?' He said it in a soft and quiet voice but it was too much for me. I started sobbing and tears were falling down my cheeks. 'I'll take that as a yes' Cooper mumbled as he put his arms around me for comfort.

I didn't know how long I cried into Cooper's shirt but as the sobs started to die down he asked 'Can you tell me what happened?' I nodded slowly and began. 'After Mr. Shue came into class to me what happened to Blaine, I went to get my stuff from the locker and Karofsky was there. He shoved me into the locker and said he was the one who hurt Blaine and he would hurt him again and worse if I didn't break up with him. After I...broke with him Blaine Karofsky left me alone but today these football players came to me and said he wanted to talk to me. You know the rest.' I hid my face in my hands not wanting to look at Blaine's brother. 'You did it to protect my brother' he said more to himself I guess. After a moment I felt his hand on my shoulder and he said 'Kurt look at me.' I looked up again. 'You should have come to me' he said. 'No!' I stood up which caused my head to spin again but I ignored it. 'Kurt?' Cooper asked confused. 'What if he really had hurt Blaine again because I'd refused to break up with him?' I started screaming again. 'If that had happened I could never live with myself. I love Blaine more than anything else in this world.' Cooper looked up at me and a small smile appeared on his lips. He got up and walked to the exit. 'Where are you going?' I asked confused. 'We are going to Blaine now' Cooper said still with a smile on his face. 'And you tell him exactly what you just told me.' 'What? No!' I started to panic. 'He hates me!' 'You know as well as me that it's not true' Cooper said while holding the door open. 'You're coming?' I knew Blaine didn't hate me but I was afraid how he would react when he found out the truth but I owned it to him.

I sighed and walked to Cooper.

'Fine.'