legends ; ryden

9

legends ; 9

brendon was walking towards the cemetery, it was scary at night but it was the only time he didn't feel stupid about talking to a stone in the ground. he sat down in front of the stone, and slowly made a cross over his body.

"hey mom," brendon started, he traced the engraved letters on the plaque buried in the ground, it was the first love letter his father gave her back in high school. "i uh, i met someone..." he smiled lightly as he traced over the word love. "his name's ryan, i really like him." brendin felt stupid for saying he was a boy,  he didn't want his mum to be disappointed in him. "i hope you don't mind that he's... a boy. i couldn't help it." he laughed lightly. his mom was always very accepting of what brendon wanted, as long as it wasn't putting him in danger, she supported him. but with the homophobia in the town he couldn't help but worry. he kept mindlessly tracing the letters as he spilled his mind onto her grave. "i want him to be my boyfriend... i don't know if it's a good idea though." brendon admitted and restarted tracing the letters once he reached the end of it. "with the way this place is... i don't know."

ryan was on his mind a lot, too often if brendon was being honest. "i think you'd like him." he stated with another small smile because, he knows his mum would like ryan. she would love how shy ryan is when they'd first meet, she'd love how happy he acts, she'd love how polite he is, she'd love that he made brendon feel less lonely. "i might introduce him to dad, if i get a chance." brendon sometimes forgets his father mostly because, he's never home and when he is he's passed out on the couch with a bottle of brendons mothers favourite liquor in hand. "dad, he misses you a lot." brendon says, settling on tracing over her full name from the letter. "i miss you a lot." it's been about 5 years since she died but, sometimes it feels like it's been longer. he can't remember, but time seemed to slow down when she died. days felt shorter and sleepless nights felt like they lasted weeks.

ryan made the nights more bearable though, ryan was always there at night to make the dragging hours seem like minutes. he never had enough time with ryan. "i hope you're doing good, i love you." he smiled and kissed his fingers before laying his hand on her name that was carved into the polished slab of marble sticking from the ground.