Friends with Benefits

Part 27

Friends With Benefits chapter 27:

It's been a few weeks since the news broke about Ashley and her loss. Since then, Justin has been devastated. He says "I was really getting used to the though of having a little version of me running around, it's hard the let it go." All I could do was in the nicest way I could keep reminding him that I'm pregnant with his baby too. He says "I know and I'm so happy for that but knowing that something I created in gone still hurts."

At this point he would wander off to one of the two studios he has and be in there for hours. I can't help but feel like he's sending the message that he wanted her baby more than mine. That was a horrible thought considering he broke down crying at the hospital saying he loved me, so I let it go. He told Ashley that he would help her with financials until she could get back on her feet but she wasn't moving in with him anymore because there was no reason. I know this is selfish but in a way I can't help but be relieved that I don't have to share Justin with someone else anymore.

Today I told Justin I wanted to start shopping for the baby. He seemed happy to get out of grief and work toward the future. "I like this one." I said pointing to the rectangular crib. "It's pink, what it we have a boy?" He said wandering over to some blue cribs. "But what if it is a girl? What if we look at other colors? There has to be more around here." I said grabbing onto my buggy and pushing it to the next aisle with Justin following behind. He was on his phone with a twisted face.
I did a double take before deciding I better ask. "What's the matter?" "Erm, Ashley." I cringed at her name, this was supposed to be our fucking day.

I put my hand on my hip and one on my bump. "And..?" "She wants me to buy her a car." He said shifting awkwardly.
"Why the hell should you buy her anything?!" I snapped raising my voice. "Destiny, keep your voice down." "You know what? No, I wont," I responded stubbornly. Maybe it's the pregnancy hormones but I didn't want to let this go. "She is not carrying your child anymore! This is supposed to be our day! I get you agreed to 'help her back on her feel' but this is too fucking far!"
At that moment a baby a few aisles over started to cry.

The mother peeped her head around the corner in our direction. "Can you take your argument somewhere else please?!" Justin grabbed my wrist and let me out of the store and toward the mall food court. "What do you want to eat?" He asked leading to a table next to the public children's play area. "I want Mexican" I said as I observed the children playing with the toy cars and climbing on the structures.

I rested my head on my chin and drifted off wondering someday me and Justin will be the middle aged couple watching out multiple children chase each other around. I heard a sigh and felt the seat next to me become filled. "Is it crazy to think that one day that's going to be us?" Justin asked snaking his arm around my waist. Its like he knew exactly what i was thinking.

I turned to face him, "you really think that can be you and me? Is they what you really want?" I asked surprised. "Of course. I love you." "I love you too" I said before kissing his lips and letting all the negativeness of earlier disappear.