close // shyland

t h r e e

He listened to me. He didn't once try to speak to me. He never knocked on the bedroom door. He never called my name. He left me totally alone. And I felt fucking awful. I knew he didn't try anything because the way I spoke to him or more specifically what I spoke to him. I really hurt him. I had been sitting in the bed soaking in all my guilt and pride. I honestly didn't even know if he was still here. Part of me hoped. The other part wished he was gone so he wasn't sulking in sadness downstairs. I knew I had a right to be mad, but so did he and I was not handling it very maturely and hurt Shane deeply. I knew he was sorry, but my hurt allowed me to ignore that. I was knocked from my thoughts by a vibration from my phone.

Lily: Ry! You down to go out tonight?

Ryland: I'm not feeling up for it really

Lily: Why are you being lame

Ryland: I'm sorry it's just been a rough few days

Lily: Sounds like a perfect reason to get fucked up

Ryland: I'm gonna have to pass

Lily: How come Shane is out and you're not

Ryland: What?

Lily: Twitter lol

I don't respond and open my Twitter app immediately. I scroll slightly to see Drew has posted a picture.

@mytoecold: I don't drink why am I here with them

It was a picture of Drew looking nervous as Shane and Garrett had their arms around each other behind him. I was furious.

Ryland: let's go

Lily: YES QUEEN

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I hopped in Lily's car as she whistled at me.

"Ryland looking fine, Shane's quaking." She laughed. I smiled uneasy about the memories I was getting. I shook that off and let her drive us in silence to our destination. "So, Joslyn and Drew are already there and are two drinks ahead." She spoke again pulling into a parking space.

"Shocking." I joked surprising myself.

"Are you alright?" She asked, and I tensed. I did not want to talk about Shane.

"I'm fine promise let's just go get fucked up." I forced a believable smiled onto my face and she nodded. We parked and were soon making our way inside a bar that looked packed beyond their capacity. Lily guided me to Joslyn and Drew's booth area that had around six people.

"Ryland! Lily!" I heard Drew yell in her intoxicated state. I smiled sitting next to her in the small space she made for me.

"We just ordered a round of shots too!" Joslyn said. I smiled.

"Perfect." I said to her. I was trying to get absolutely wasted. The shots came and went almost immediately. Soon it became a haze. Drinks were being handed to me quicker than I could keep up with. We were so loud and constantly laughing about...something. I couldn't remember but I knew I was fully gone and happy about it. As Drew once again laughed so hard she screamed, I decided to make a trip to the restroom. I slowly but surely make my way past the many bodies to the restrooms which were thankfully empty. As I left, I saw a familiar set of eyes and fluffy hair. Shane. I stopped walking in the middle of the bar to stare at him. He was sat next to Garrett at the end of the booth which was full with Drew and others he didn't or couldn't be bothered to recognize. Shane's eyes seemed slightly glazed over with intoxication and he was smiling. Garrett turned his head to say something to Shane and Shane laughed loudly snorting and covering his mouth with his hand. I couldn't control it anymore. I turned around to see a man holding two drinks. I grab one from his hands and begin walking to Shane.

"Hey!" I hear the man call but I ignore him. I am on a mission. Drew is the first that spots me, but he has no time to say anything before I splash the drink all over Shane and wetting Garrett as well. He jumped in shocked and shrieked slightly turning his head in my direction. His eyes softened, and he looked confused.

"Ryland what the hell?" He asked loud enough for me to hear. Garrett moved away from him slightly to accept a napkin from Drew.

"I should be saying that to you!" I yelled at him.

"Excuse me I didn't come pour a drink on you!" He shouted angry.

"No but you did leave with no warning or heads up to come out a drink." I said struggling with my last words.

"You're drunker than I am." Shane said rolling his eyes.

"Shut up. You left without telling me to get drunk with Garrett and Drew. I had to find out from Twitter where the fuck my boyfriend was." I said angry, but Shane didn't look sorry. He stood up in front of me and his eyes met mine. He didn't look sorry... he looked sad.

"You told me to leave you alone, so I did." He said simply as he stared at me. I kept our eye contact, but I was fuming.

"Leave me alone wasn't code for go get fucked up with Garrett." I said passing an angry glance towards Garrett who looked surprised.

"I didn't come with just Garrett." Shane said rolling his eyes.

"That's not the point." I said yelling once again only to be one upped by Shane.

"Then what is the point Ryland? You keep saying that like I don't understand so why can't you make me understand instead? You're really pissing me off and I can't take it anymore!" Shane yelled and even in the overcrowded loud bar, everyone stopped talking.

"Shane..." Garrett said coming to stand behind him as if he felt the regret for Shane's words. But Shane looked like anything but regret as I stared in his eyes and studied his face. He meant it and he wasn't backing down. So, neither was I.

"Then you don't have to deal with it anymore." I said placing my hands on my hips. Shane looked confused but still angry.

"What does that even mean?" He asked. I smirked.

"Goodbye Shane, have a nice life." I said before turning around and walking out. I heard Garrett say something to Shane, but I couldn't make it out. I rolled my eyes. That's Garrett's problem now not mine.