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Waking nightmare

"Eleven!" Brenner shouted, making her cower further into the uncomfortable metal chair on which she was sitting, pulling her knees up to her chest as if she were a child again. "You will concentrate! You will find the man on that picture! Do you understand?!" he shouted in her face, clearly losing his temper.

"Y...yes, Papa" she stuttered back, tears escaping from her eyes against her will. She didn't want to appear weak in front of him, she didn't want to feel scared of him, but she could never hide the truth, he still terrified her, she was still scared of letting him down, of disappointing him.

"Now" he growled in a low voice, "sit up and do it now."

Eleven complied, scared of the consequences. She hadn't had treatment for a while now, maybe a month or more, but she knew it was always an option, and Papa had threatened her with it only last week. He seemed so angry with her recently; he never used to shout at her, instead explaining things slowly and simply, and she couldn't work out what she'd done wrong, she did everything he asked, demanded really, to the best of her ability. True, she'd been having more dreams recently, and she knew she'd been distracted. She knew because the new scientist, Dr Holtz, had been introduced to her recently, and her rigid schedule had been changed to incorporate sessions with her. They were odd, Dr Holtz asked her questions about her feelings and the dreams. Eleven didn't like sharing their contents, she wanted to keep them secret, just for herself. They made her feel things she'd never felt before, she felt as if she belonged, she was cared for, she was loved...and she loved in return. The girl in her dreams, she didn't know what to think about her. Eleven liked the way the girl looked, he hair was such an amazing color, her smile lit up her face and Eleven couldn't help but smile when she thought of it. A feeling always developed in the pit of her stomach, almost like feeling sick, but in a good way. She looked forward to sleep now just so she could see her.

She sat up straight and looked at the picture. The man looked unremarkable, dark hair, beard, normal clothes. She inwardly sighed and closed her eyes, searching for the man. She honed in on him, he was sat at a long table and speaking in a foreign tongue, everyone else at the table was looking at him, listening to his every word so she knew he must be important.

Brenner sat back in his chair, finally satisfied with Eleven's work as the man's voice was relayed through the speakers in the room. He watched her carefully, the way her eyes moved under her lids, her breathing slow and steady, concentrating hard. He saw how much she had grown, from the baby taken from Terry Ives to the young woman in front of him, and wondered how long they could continue their work, indefinitely he hoped.

Suddenly her breathing quickened slightly and the voice through the speakers started to cut out. "Eleven?" he questioned warily, never forgetting the first time this had happened.

Her attention flitted away from the man in the picture, she felt a sudden rush, like she was racing through a crowd of people at incredible speed, but they didn't know she was there. As quickly as it had started, she came to a halt. Looking around, she found she was in a small room with grey walls. On one side of the room was a thin, uncomfortable looking bed, on which a figure lay curled up facing the wall.

"Eleven?" Brenner repeated.

She approached the bed silently, for some reason both her breathing and heart rate increasing. As she reached her hand forward to touch the figure on the shoulder, it turned to reveal a girl, her, the girl from her dreams. They locked eyes and stayed that way for what seemed like hours, eventually Eleven opened her mouth to say something "..."

"Eleven!" shouted Brenner, making Eleven jump and quickly breaking the...whatever it was she was seeing.

"Eleven, what happened?" Brenner questioned, a mixture of anger and trepidation on his face.

"I...I don't know, I lost the connection and...couldn't find it again."

Brenner studied her face thoughtfully then nodded, but he couldn't hide his dissatisfaction with her explanation. Without looking away from her, their eyes locked, "Guards!"

Eleven tried to hide her fear, tried to hide her trembling arms.

"Take her to her room and get me Dr Holtz" he ordered, finally looking away as the first tear made its way down her face.

Two white-uniformed men came in and waited for Eleven to stand. She did so, but clearly too slowly for their liking as one of them grabbed her arm roughly and pulled her away.

*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*

"Holtz, whatever is going on with Eleven, its starting to interfere with the work again, she can't concentrate, she needs...refocusing."

Holtz sighed inwardly, "ok, but you know the risks. I recommend waiting, but you have final say."

"Prepare the treatment room, be ready in an hour" he said coldly. Holtz just nodded her head 'yes' in acknowledgement.

*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*

The guards escorted Eleven to her room and shoved her roughly inside, she didn't even turn around anymore to protest or to beg, knowing it'd just cause trouble and delay her being alone, for that's what she wanted to be right now, alone. An hour, enough time to sleep, enough time to try and see her. Eleven didn't have the vocabulary to describe her feelings, but if she did she would probably describe it as addictive. Like a drug, she couldn't get enough of the dreams, of the way they made her feel, the way she felt inside them, safe, protected, loved, as if she belonged there and not in the lab that had been her home her entire life.

So, while she waited for the waking nightmare of her life, she sought solace in the blissful dreams of her sleep.

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