I miss you.
Ever since you left to another country you never called me or messaged me. You changed your number but I never got the new one. I didn't want to ask for it because before you left I begged you for forgiveness and asked you to be the way you used to be with me before that, but you couldn't answer. The answer was no, I guess. I tried my best to fix things up. If I recall my mistake was forgetting you when i moved to another city, I never really forgot you, I would think about us often but I'm shit at remembering to call and ask how people are. I realized that the hard way.
Before moving to another city during my last days of school, we were still mad at each other but eventually forgave and forgot. You gave me a letter on my last day of school which was somewhat in august. I forgot to read it. It was not until I found out in November you were leaving, my heart sank and I became depressed cause you weren't talking to me. During the last days I stumbled across your letter and cried to it so hard. It was then when I realised how much I was about to lose from my life, and I wanted to make it up to you and publicly asked for forgiveness. You did forgive me. But.. when i told you I loved you, you didn't say it back not even once. You knew how much I valued friendship and you'd always say it but in the end you stopped saying it.
It was hard for me to grasp that, you were the best person I had ever met. You were my ride or die. You were so much more than a friend to me. You were my soul sister. I would share everything with you, stuff nobody knew about me. You would tell me everything about your life, stuff know one knows about you.
I miss being cared for, I would always be the mother giving advice and help, you were the only one that acted as my fairy god mother haha even though you were younger than me. I was happy with you.
I still stalk your facebook profile, your stories and sometimes check my whatsapp to see if you opened your old number again. And i will always. I want to remember I had a friend who would always be mad 24/7 at other people and how I'd laugh at you sometimes cause I thought you were adorable when you were mad. I want to remember always when someone like you had my back. I want to remember how you would never judge me. I want to also remember your stubbornness and sarcasm. *You don't post much though.*
I still love you and miss you so much. My birthday just passed and I was waiting the whole day for you to wish me. That made me sad. I'm sorry for everything. I hope youve met so many amazing people, I hope youre happy, I hope everything is just the way you like it..
A part of me hopes you miss me, a part of me hopes you still love me but then a part of me knows you probably don't care at all.
I will always have your back, always remember you and love you forever. I miss you a lot.
Sincerely
your ex best friend
