Nothing at all / General Hux X OC

I don't get it...

Waking up was depressing. While  I was never a morning person, waking up and knowing that you will have to work with documents all day, made it even harder. To my surprise, I was the first one im the cafeteria and that made me wonder if i was late or too early.  I relaxed when I saw Anita walk in, smiling?
"Hello, well don't you seem happy" I said while taking a sip of my drink.
"Hey! Of course I am" she sat down, all glowing in joy " I'm really excited for today!"
"Why though? "
"I don't know, the job went really well yesterday so I hope to do as well today" she smiled " but you look kinda depressed..."
" yeahm...well opposite of you I had a really shity day "
"What happened?"
I sighed and began the story...
"So I had to manage documents... and I did a terrible job 'cause i don't know how these things work. After work I go to the  generals office,  he then says I did a horrible job....and he told me that I will have to manage documents till i learn how to manage them..."
Anita was frowning
"That's. ..like really not cool"
"Yeah and i don't know what to do about it...I'll just probably go with the flow like I always do " I stood up from my seet "well have a nice day " I give Anita a smile.
" You too, I hope the General won't be too harsh "
"We'll  see , thanks "
As I'm walking down the hallway I think about the phrase "Go with the flow"  I think that is going to be my life motto from now on, I always go with the flow, in life I usually don't know where I'm going and I just leave it to faith and hope it knows what it's doing.

When I got to my work space, I wasted no time and started reading the completely new set of documents .
I loved the ones where you could simply write Yes or No, but there weren't a lot of them. The ones with financial things and basically everything with money were the most pain in the ass... the sentences were written in such complicated manner that you could hardly understand what everything ment. Like one sentence would say, they have sent the money, but the other sentance would say, you wont get the money and you have to pay them because they sent you the money and in the end I have to write if we agree or not agree...AGREE TO WHAT!?....TO GET THE MONEY OR TO PAY TO GET THE MONEY!!! I DON'T GET IT!!!!
I was sitting at my desk  rubbing my temples, confused of what I have to write here.

"Need help?" I heard a frendly voice, it was  Mayor Tabaka, a man probably 20 years older than me, but in a very good shape I would say. I simply nodded and moved a little so he could get a look at the document on the screen.

"Hmm , leave this one to me, this is a tricky one " he said and patted on my back. I stood up from the table as that was the last document I had. Walking back to my quarters I saw General Hux approaching from the opposite side.Oh no... I just hoped he wont say anything to me. The whole time he kept his eyes on me, that made me feel really uncomfortable,  i didn't know where to look, should I look at him? Look at the floor? The ceiling? But before i could decide where to look he was standing infront of me.

"Finished with your work already lieutenant Kavos?" He said
"Yes, General"
"Good, I hope you didn't fail at managing the documents as you did last time."
"I hope that too..."  I mumbled
"There are more documents that I would like you to take care of. They will soon be sent to you datapad"

Lifeless, I got back to the same old room filled with people,  all working, eyes close to the monitors, it all seemed so miserable.  I should  get use to it because I'll probably be spending a lot of time here.

Just as I sat down to work, I was called to the General's office.

Here we go again...

With my head held down low I walked, well more like ran, through the corridors, passing people, who seemed very curious , mostly likely  thinking  Where is she going so fast?  And the answer to that was  To her funeral...
I tried to avoid any eye contact with everyone, but I did look up from the floor when I saw Anita walking from the opposite direction. She first greeted me with a smile,  but when she noticed my condition and the direction I was going in, she seemed shocked and also said a quiet  "oh shit...not again..." in which I just nodded and walked off.

Now I was standing in front of the door, this time I was not only scared but I was also mad, thinking,  what did he not like this time!?

The door opened and I saw a furious General standing and looking directly at me,  I felt some kind of weight on my shoulders. This time it must be really bad.

I stepped in and when the door closed behind me I felt trapped,  no one could help me now. I was stuck here and I'll have to survive everything that the general does to me. At times like this you start to think if the walls are soundproof and if anyone will hear your cry  for help.

Hux came closer to me, maybe even closer that last time and ,I don't know if thats possible , i felt anger radiating from him.

" I don't understand ..." he said while gritting his teeth  " how can you overlook a thing like that!" He was obviously trying to hold himself from doing the worst to me. I looked down at my feet, feeling guilty, even if i still didn't know what I did.

I felt his hand grabbing my hair and yanking it down so  that I was now looking at him. It was terrifying. He was extremely close to me and that made me want to take a step back, just to have a bit more space, but I was too afraid to move at this point.

"YOU!!!DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID!?" I shook my head in denial " If I wouldn't have read that document before sending it, The First Order would have lost 25 million credits, just because of your one ... stupid..mistake..."
My eyes widened in surprise,  I don't remember any documents that said anything about  that kind of money.
He released  his grip on my hair and walked back to his table, but he didn't sit down.
I was standing there, waiting for him to say dismissed wanting to get out of this place as fast as possible, but he didn't say it.

"You will continue your job, but you will do it here, so that i could keep an eye on you"  and he gestured to sit in his chair.  When i did,  he opened the file with all of the documents and sat down at the armchair a bit further away from the table, taking his datapad and writing something in it.

Even though the General's chair was unimaginably comfortable it didn't help with managing documents. Now it was even more harder to work, firstly because of the incident that I had earlier and being in the presents of your boss was making everything worse.

I had only finished two documents in maybe 30 min and i was completely stuck with the third one. I was reading it over and over again, not getting what they are asking me to do. Then i heard the general standing up from his place and walking behind me...

"That's only the third document!" He seemed pissed off again"You have a  voice! If you don't understand something you just use it and ask for help! You won't accomplish anything by simply sitting here!!!"

He leaned in and started reading it. My hands under the table started shaking. Couldn't he understand that i was too afraid to ask for help?

"What on earth you didn't understand here?"  He said while still scrolling through the document
" I don't know, I just read it a lot of times and it didn't seem to make any sense to me..."
"You are pathetic... can't handle even the simplest task. You are worthless...how did  you even get in the academy in the first place ? I'm not even talking about graduating it and having one of the best marks..."

Should I tell him that I have no idea? Probably not.

His words actually hit me...pathetic ...worthless... am I really like that?

"Well if I am doing such a horrible job with the documents...why not sent me somewhere else? Wouldn't that be easier for you and for me? " I finally gave him a bit of my mind.  He seemed surprised by the fact that i said so much.

"First if all, everyone needs to know how to do these things and if they didn't teach you that earlier,  I will teach it now and second of all..what makes you think I will go for the easier option?" I stayed quite,  basically because i didn't have anything to say to him, but I still didn't agree to the fact that I had to learn this stuff, it was just not my thing.