Knuckles // Tradley AU

17. And Give Up - Brad

"Tell me about him." I whispered, taking a large swig from the red topped bottle of vodka, it was day three in the search for Connor and nothing promising had come out of it. So Tristan and I were laying head to head in a field, attempting to feel something other than hopeless.

"Who?" Tris hummed, staring at the cold November sky, his eyes following a particularly bright comet.

"The guy that hurt you." I frowned, I felt the blond take a deep breath and exhale it slowly, I could tell he was thinking "I just want to get to know you."

"...Brad." He swallowed hard, I couldn't see his face but i imagined a deep frown washing over him, the creases on his brow as deep as the abyss of his eyes.

"Yeah?" I hummed naively, unaware that all the trust I had placed in the older man was about to be given up.

"I might have told you a white lie...just to make sure I could get you to trust me enough to let me in, to get you out. It was never meant to stay that way." He rambled, and the more words he spoke, the more I felt what was left of my bruised and beaten soul falling through the floor. Crashing and burning.

"So you lied to me." I replied shakily, sitting up "What else have you lied about?" I whispered, standing up "Loving me? Wanting me safe? Not wanting anything to happen? I'm sure you'd fucking love it if Ryan were to appear right now, take me home and fucking kill Me. You sick sadistic fuck."

"Brad, no." Tris attempted to stop me as I turned and attempted to begin running. His hand gripped on to my wrist and pulled me back. My heart was racing, I flinched at the still tender bruises that had been engraved deep into my wrists, I lost my footing and soon enough I was pulled in to the liars lap, sobbing so hard, I had never felt anything as painful as I was going through right that second. I'd take a second stab to the kidney if it meant I was never put through it again.

"Please let me go." I sobbed, his fingers still wrapped around my wrist. I was so restricted, I was trapped. I had no choice but to endure the excuses.

"I can't do that." He whispered gently. Always gently, I should've seen through it, I knew I shouldn't have trusted him, and yet I fell for it, even there, his actions mirroring Ryan's perfectly, I still trusted him.

"Why." I cried "Y-You're hurting me."

"I'm sorry bear." He whispered, finally letting go of my wrist, but moving to my waist, he was around me, I could feel his breath on my neck and whilst the warmth was welcomed, it made me panic. Mentally I thought I knew what was coming next and I knew to just grit my teeth and bare through it. And yet, it never came. "I never wanted to hurt you." He explained gently, his knuckle gently sliding over my tear stained cheeks as I continued to sob "Hey, unclench that jaw for me, that's got to hurt."

"S-sorry." I apologised "I want to go home."

"Okay, let's go home Brad." Tris nodded, guiding me off of his lap and letting go of me, I saw my chance to get away as he began to stand up. I turned and began to run. Praying he couldn't catch me again.

I heard him shout of for me and I could smell his cigarettes on my jumper even as I tried to get away. I quickly slowed down, my tears stopping me from breathing, and of course he caught up with me. I was going crazy. I hated him and yet I still trusted. I couldn't pull myself away from the blond who just broke my heart.

"You need to stop running Brad." He said calmly, his hand finding its way into mine, I appreciated it a lot more around my wrist, at least that didn't hurt as badly. At least it didn't feel like he still cared.

"Tris." I cried "Why. Why did you do this."

"I wanted you." He whispered, leading me back to the car we both knew both of us were far to fucked up to safely operate. "I wanted to help you, I wanted to feel like I had a reason to live, I wanted to make sure you were safe, and the only way I could gain your trust enough to make you believe I could help you- was to lie and tell you I've been through it. I'm so sorry, I promise, everything else I've ever said is true. I'd never mean to hurt you."

"You act like Ryan." I whispered "Hands around my wrist like that, lying to get what you want. It's all the same."

"I know, I know, I'm a piece of shit." Tris nodded, helping me get into the back of the car, him doing the same and closing the door "But I wouldn't hurt you like he did Brad."

"Well then, why did you?"

"It was an accident. I'm sorry." Tris apologised.

"Sure." I whispered "That's What he used to say."

"Would Ryan ever kiss you like this?" He whispered before leaning across the seat and pressing his lips to mine so deeply and sincerely I could feel his soul touching mine.

"Stop." I whispered after we both pulled away "I really can't do this. I can't."

"What's stopping you."

"My head." I sighed "I don't want to end up that basket case that runs into your arms. I'm not your little project Tristan- now, where's my fucking vodka?"

"Lost somewhere." He sighed, reaching underneath the front passenger seat and holding up a golden bottle of whiskey "Luckily, I came prepared."

"Fucking hell." I whispered, taking the bottle out of his hands and beginning to drink out of it after wiping my cheeks "I'm sorry for my over-reaction - I-I didn't mean it."

"It's alright." He hummed "I guess we're stuck here for the night, I don't want to die in an accident."

I'd happily die.

"That's fair enough." I nodded, closing the bottle and putting it down by my feet and leaning into the blond.

"You're so cold." He hummed quietly, his arms around me, and I felt safe, I knew I shouldn't, I had just uncovered the manipulative side he had so desperately tried to hide from me, and yet, I still painted his intentions golden.

"So cold." I agreed, coming in closer, and closer, until I was eventually sat on him, facing him. His hands on my waist, doing things I promised myself I wouldn't in James' car with a man I knew I shouldn't be trusting.