Giving Up (An Austin Mahone Fanfic)

Chapter Nine

Chapter Nine

- Alessandra -

While we were at the mall, everything reminded me of him. I couldn't take it anymore. I have to move on just like he did. He doesn't care about me or our relationship which hurts me terribly. It's not even two months since I've moved here yet and he's changed. When he used to tell me that I'm the only one he wants to be with, that was a lie. Maybe he didn't even love me. I don't know.

Me and Natalie walk into Forever21 and I instantly go to all of the colorful shirts.

I looked around to find Natalie but I couldn't find her. All of a sudden I see her running towards me. "Al! This would look so cute on you!", Natalie says while holding up a pink cardigan. The one I wore with Austin which was his favorite. He bought me it for one of the random times we went to the mall. I cringed at the sight of the shirt and Natalie just looked at me.

"Nat, Austin bought me that shirt", I say while looking down at the ground.

"Oh my god! I'm so sorry! Do you want to leave? We don't have to stay here."

I look back up at her seeing that she was concerned. "No no it's fine we can stay", I smiled.

She said "okay" and kept looking through the racks of clothes. I really didn't want to be here. Everything around me is still reminding me of him. Even though I'm not okay with our phone conversation we had earlier, I still had feelings for him which will probably not go away. Ever. I'll always care about him and there will always be a spot in my heart for him even if we're not together or even friends for that matter.

After shopping, I didn't get anything and then there's Natalie who literally bought every store. She definitely spent over 500 dollars.

We then went to Applebee's for dinner and had our normal girl conversations which she did all the talking for. I didn't feel like talking, I only listened which was good since I want to get to know Natalie more.

When I finally got home, every emotion that I was feeling came out. I spent every single day for the next two weeks crying. Some of the days I didn't go to school and I didn't even care. I couldn't show my face at school looking miserable like I am. I still haven't heard from Austin in months which means he definitely moved on.

****

It was a Thursday morning and I was on my way for another normal day at school, which I dreaded. Thank god there are only two weeks of school left until summer break. I wore baggy clothes to school since I didn't care about how I looked, there's no one to impress. I used to always dress nice and actually feel good about myself but soon after I left everything about me changed. Especially my happiness and personality. I used to be fun and bubbly but now I'm to myself and I barely talk to others, besides Natalie.

I got to school and went to my locker. I felt people staring at me. I know I'm ugly you don't have to stare, I thought to myself. People don't stare for a good reason, they're just judging me.

When I got into homeroom, I immediately saw my best friend Natalie with her light brown hair curled with her green eyes staring at me and I sat down in the empty seat next to her. She kept asking if I was okay but I just told her that I was fine and to not worry about me. She did what I told her to do and started talking about something else. She started off by talking about the boy she likes and how he's ignoring her. Wow that sounds familiar. I hate boys. I really do. They treat girls like their items and they play with their feelings. They don't care about our hearts or feelings. They only want something from us which they use us for.

The day went by in a blur. When the bell rung so we can leave, I walked out to my car and drove home. I drove home in silence which is just the way I like it. I barely listen to fun and upbeat music anymore, all I listen to are gloomy and depressing songs. I shouldn't be doing that because it makes me even more upset but I like it.

When I arrived at the house, I took the keys out of the ignition and hopped out of the seat and closed the door behind me. I walked into the house and found my mother and grandparents talking at the kitchen table. Why is my mom home? She's supposed to be working today. I shrugged my shoulders as I walked past them and went into my room. I closed the door and laid on my bunk. I'm the only one out of my siblings home since I get out earlier than them. I always wait for my brother to get home and everyday we do something so we can get both our minds off of things. He doesn't like living here either because he had a million friends in Texas and he had to quit baseball which is what he lived for because we ran out of money. We didn't have the money for most things anymore. My mom put the money that my father left for us in all 4 of our bank accounts to save for when we're older and actually need it. That didn't bother me but I wish we had some money to actually live.

When my brother got home, I decided to take him to the beach. It actually was hot outside since it's the beginning of June. We both changed into our bathing suits and ran out of the house to the beach. The house is right on the beach which was the best part of living there. I didn't go to the beach here as much because it reminded me of Austin but I'm only going for my brother.

"I'm going to beat you there!", my brother yelled while running in front of me.

"Oh no you're not!" I run a little slower to let him win.

We finally reached the sand. "Ha! I won! Now you owe me an ice cream date!", my brother says with the biggest smile on his face.

I chuckle, "Okay Joey let's go play some volleyball!"

We played volleyball and then went in the water. I wanted to take the sun because I need a tan desperately.

Me and my brother got home right before dinnertime. After both of us took showers, it was time for dinner. The table was silent and it was awkward. We were all looking down eating and occasionally looked up at each other. Me, my brother, and my sisters had no idea about what was going on but whatever it was, it was serious. I remembered that my mom didn't go to work today which is odd and I had the feeling that my mother and grandparents were going to tell us something. What could it be? Is it good or bad?