All my love

Ambivalence

I hate you
I hate the pretty little smile you shoot her
The same one I've dreamed about being sent my way
I hate the curve of your hair, especially when she ruffles it up
The same way I've dreamed about doing myself
I hate the loving sparkle in your eyes when you look at her
The same look I've been dreaming of
And I hate that she's the only one to see

I hate her
I hate how she gets everything she wants
Everything I want
I hate how she gets to kiss you senseless at dead late in the night
Everything I want
I hate that she gets to comfort you when you're at your worst
Everything I want
And get the effect when you're at your best
You're everything I want

I hate that I love you
More than she ever will
More than I want to
More than you love me
I hate that I know you
More than she ever will
More than I want to
More than you know me
I hate that she's there for you
More than I am
More than I want her to be
More than you'll ever let me

I hate that I can't hate you
I hate that your my every thought
I hate that I want you
I hate that she has you
I hate that I'll never have you
And I want to say I hate you
But really I never could
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Here ya go, to my 2 readers I have left, yet another depressing poem by ya girl

Idk if this sounds greedy but it's kinda upsetting that I used to get so many views and now I'm posting my own stuff that isn't a fan fiction, just my own thoughts and stuff that's festered up in my mind and quickly typed into my notepad only to be thought upon and fixed over the whole week, and I'm not getting many views. I know that probably makes me sound hella selfish or something but it's kinda discouraging to get no reads when I'm attempting to be an author and this is kinda my test to see if people like my stuff that I write with my own ideas, ya know?

Anyways

Ily- Lizzy