Static Electricity | Sam and Colby

Four

The illusion doesn't last long and funnily enough, Sam is the one to break it. Colby is still asleep on top of his bedsheets so Sam leaves him there, having gotten no sleep himself. It's nothing new but it still makes him foggy around the edges. He doesn't mean to eavesdrop on Colby when he stumbles back to his room but it's too late.

"Yeah, sorry, I fell asleep on his bed after we recorded a video." Colby's voice is still thick with sleep and Sam sighs. "I know, I know. I'm trying. That's what you wanted, right? Just let me try and fix things. If it doesn't work, we'll figure something else out."

Sam doesn't want to hear more. He can't deal with that kind of pain this morning. He doesn't know who Colby was talking to and he doesn't care. The brunette can have other friends, Sam isn't going to restrict him like that.

He's tired, he thinks, he's tired and sad and he just wants to sleep and not wake up. Is that bad? It's not like he'd ever kill himself. He doesn't want that. He just wants to sleep and wake up when things are okay. Some would class that as suicidal, Sam just classes it as a boy who's done with trying so hard.

He walks downstairs and makes a coffee, not really hungry. He should be worried about that, he thinks, but he's not and he's not sure if that's good or bad. He doesn't care, he decides. He's still breathing and he's okay, that's enough for him.

"Morning!" Colby chirps as he walks downstairs. Sam smiles at him in greeting but drinks his coffee instead of saying anything. Colby grabs his keys, already dressed. "I'm heading over to Brennen's."

"Have fun," Sam murmurs but Colby's already gone. The door shutting reminds him that he has to make anise video for his channel soon. His fans have been asking for a 3am Challenge. Maybe they have some ideas for him. He's just about to retreat back to his room when Corey struts in, camera at the ready.

"Saaaaaam," he whines. "Elton broke my phone chargerrrrrr."

Sam snorts. "Get a new one then," he says.

"But I don't wanna go to the shops alooone."

"Get Devyn."

"She's out for the day."

"Aaron?"

"Busy."

Sam sighs but keeps a small smile on his face. Maybe a trip out with Corey will get him out of the hole he finds himself standing in. "Let me get ready."

Corey cheers and Sam darts upstairs, gathering his stuff quickly and throwing on some shoes. It's nice to hear someone be so excited about spending time with him. It's been too long since he's been asked to do something. The thought makes him freeze for a moment but Corey either doesn't notice or Corey doesn't care and Sam gets dragged out to the car.

They drive to the shops, Corey vlogging and Sam laughing. He's happy, he knows he is, because it doesn't take him much to smile and Corey never mentions anything so Sam reckons he's doing okay. Something about his thinking puts a bad taste in his mouth but he swallows it back and frowns at himself. It's like he's trying to drag himself down.

"Sam?"

Corey's looking at him and Sam fights off his brief moment of blind panic. Everything's okay, he reassures himself. Dude, just focus on right now.

He gives Corey a winning smile. "Yeah dude?"

Corey blinks and suspicion flickers to life deep in his brown eyes. Sam politely pretends not to notice. Corey really has nothing to be worried about. "You good, bro?" Corey asks.

"Yeah, dude. Why wouldn't I be?"

Corey shrugs. "I don't know, just thought you might be like Colby for a sec."

Sam tenses up instantly and he knows Corey notices because the other YouTuber stops and faces him, eyes calculating and concerned. Sam knows he's just slipped up in a major way. He wonders what's going to happen between them now and his heart beats just that little bit faster.

"That's nonsense," he manages, laughing nervously. It sounds slightly strangled and he curses himself. "Colby's fine and so am I."

Corey shakes his head with a grim sort of smile. "Colby's not okay, dude."

Sam sighs, resigned to this conversation and the secrets it would ultimately reveal. Corey would figure it out, Corey is like Colby. They know how to know everything. It's intimidating and something in Sam tenses in a very bad way. Corey didn't have any right to press about Sam's personal affairs. He didn't have the right to gossip about Colby and pretend he understood what was going on. Sam's irrationally angry and he can't understand why.

"It's up to him to tell us that then," Sam says, hoping Corey gets the warning in his tone.

Apparently, he doesn't. "He doesn't really tell us much anymore," Corey muses. "You're the same."

Sam feels slightly offended. "I don't lie to you guys."

"You also don't tell us everything."

"Am I not allowed to have a private life now?" Sam asks, annoyed.

Corey meets his angry blue eyes and they fight some sort of silent battle Sam doesn't quite understand before Corey surrenders and turns away, raising his hands slightly."Alright dude, damn. Look, just keep in mind that we're all affected by your actions."

'You're not affected by Colby's,' he wants to yell. 'Colby's smarter than all of you.' But he doesn't. Instead he gives Corey a curt nod and they go back to the car and Sam drives because he needs to do something other than think right now.