Forbidden (BDSM Novel)

Chapter37: Two Halves Of A Whole

I went home that evening feeling light. Edward was amazing, liking him is not hard. Any woman with good taste will instantly fell in for his charm. Good looks, hot bod and most importantly he's a wonderful human being with lots of love in his heart. He is kind, sweet and intelligent. A total catch. Honestly, whenever I stare at him I get lost in my thoughts. I wouldn't want him to be with anyone but me yet at the same time, I know I shouldn't be with him. I'm not good enough, I will never be good enough and I'm still in love with someone else. Ed deserves someone whose in love with him. Just him. I admit now, I fell. But can anyone blame me? How can I not fall in love with this man. This wonderful kind man with a heart of gold.

But....

but Hunter is here. Even if he's not. He's always in my heart. That special corner in my heart. The biggest corner in my heart.

Hunter Petrova.

How can I begin to tell you how much I love this man? The home my heart always seeks yet I'm too afraid to open the door. Too afraid to even look at him, for I know I would never want to look away. I cant believe that coward can mock me and tease me! Now that I'm starting to heal! 7 years after the dreadful incident! Well yeah, I get that he has to protect me but he could have said something! instead of vanishing into thin fucking air! I wouldve understand, because hello, that creature who wants me dead was scary as fuck! Of course I would wanna be protected! Im not dumb.

ugh

but no, he fucking left me after he told me he loved me. How sick was that?!! Above all, he fucking spied on me! Watch me like an obsessed freak. I dont really mind the watching, I just hate that he stalks me, that he can see me but I cant see him?! He's so unfair!

But above all that, I'm still madly in love.

and I cant trust myself around him. My feelings are too strong. But my anger is just as much so in a way I have my control. Just as long as I have this raging anger that even Satan himself, would be proud.

I still dont know if I should take back my decision about Ed. I was certain earlier but now that I'm alone with my thoughts choking me and slowly killing me... I dont know.

--- × --- × ----

(4 months later)

"Hey Christine!" I called.

"Ahhhh! Alexandria! My hoe!" Christine literally ran and hug me tight as Cory held the twins in his arms.

"Language!" Cory scolded. The babies which are 5 year olds giggled playfully looking at me. They used to cry a lot. I dont know why babies cry at the sight of me. I mean, I am cute, right? but they cry whenever I try to play with them. But I'm glad Chris' twins love me now!

"Missed you Chrissy!" I hugged her tight. "And the three of you!" I said, turning to look at Cory and the babies.

"Come here!" I kneeled laughing as Cory let them go.

2 sets of arms came rushing to choke me and kill me with cuteness "April, May!" The 2 cuties kissed my face.

"I wanna play!" Said April. Her thick British accent is truly a melody. I don't know why these British people have accents made for angels. Ugh. so jelly.

"Yes, we will! but for now lets wait for Uncle Ed. Okay? I want you guys to meet my baby." I smiled kissing their heads

"You have a baby, Aunt Alex?" May asks

"No, doll. My boyfriend's son. "

"Hm.. well I wanna meet him. and I'll share my toys with him!", Said April, happily.