My Bad Boy

Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Song of the Chapter: If I Die Young by The Band Perry

~~Justin's POV~~

They took Rachel to the ICU about 40 minutes ago. They said they'd tell me when I could go see her. They said they'd be right back to get me.

"How long has it been?" I questioned, keeping my glare dead set on the door that they had brought her through.

"3 minutes more then the last time you asked me," Jayden replied hastily.

I tugged at my hair until it hurt and then brought my hands back down to my knees. I wiped my palms down the length of my jeans and shook them out, trying desperately to stay calm. I interlaced my fingers in front of me and laid my elbows on my thighs. "They said they'd be right back," I mumbled, standing from the uncomfortable hospital chair. "They said they'd come back to get me once they got her situated in her room," I muttered, pacing the waiting room.

"Dude, calm down. You're making me antsy," Jeff stammered, rubbing his temples in the process.

"Seriously Justin. Just... I don't know, sit down or something," Preston whined.

"I can't sit down anymore! I'm losing my fucking mind! Rachel is in the ICU fighting for her life because of me!" I screamed at the guys.

"You've fallen for her dude," Tony stated.

I stared at him for a while. I was trying to think of a way out of his statement. But there wasn't anything I could say. He was right. I had fallen for her and everyone knew it.

"And that's dangerous," Tony continued.

"I know," I snapped, tired of listening to this nonsense.

"Do you think this life you have her in is safe? This life that you've roped her into. Do you think this can end well for anyone? You can't give her a normal life man," Tony pressed.

"I get it!" I sneered, angrier this time.

The 5 of us went quiet. We all stared at one another, waiting for someone to break the ice into an unknown conversation.

"Do you love her?" Jeff asked softly. So we're staying on this topic.

Love. That's a strong word. I looked around, pondering the thought of me loving a girl in such a way. I swore I would never love anyone in a relationship type manner. Not after what I saw my mom go through. My dad was her whole world and after his death she lost a part of herself. Like when he died and was buried in the ground, they buried part of her with him. She slumped around the house for days, weeks even, before someone finally got her up and going again. Even at that though, she was never the same. And has still yet to be the same, a little under 2 years later. I had to hear the news from my grandparents because my mom was crying so much, she could barely breathe let alone explain to me what I missed while I was out on a job. He died of undetected lung cancer. It broke my mom. It didn't help that I wasn't there. But I swore then, that I would never put someone else or myself in a situation like that. Where you feel like you've lost a limb or a vital organ because you've lost someone you love. I never saw Rachel coming. She was death handed to me on a shiny silver platter and there was nothing I could do, but sit and watch as my life slowly started revolving around her. My girlfriend of one month was badly hurt and I felt like my chest was caving in. Did I miss my chance to stop it? Could I have stopped it if I knew what was happening? Would I have stopped it? ... Do I love her?

"Who is the young gentleman that brought in Rachel Stevens?" a tiny voice pulled me from my thoughts. I bound toward the voice before I even knew what was happening.