C.H.E.R.I.S.H

1

Life is sometimes amazingly breath-taking beautiful.
But then it can also be bitter with endless negative moments. You can either be optimistic and see the beauty in everything and just be a generally happy person. Or be pessimistic and see how actually dark and cruel life can be, but many pessimistic people doesn't share their gloomy opinions and thoughts because who wants to hang out with a negative person?

That's why many people bottle things in, we are given no option to. But it's great when you meet or have someone in your life who won't give a shit if you're pessimistic at times. Never let that person go.

I, generally, was always an optimistic person. Thanks to my father. He would always tell to always push back those sad thoughts/events to the back of my brain until I didn't even acknowledge them. It worked until the day I didn't have my father there to tell me those reassuring words. My father died 5 years ago.

Yeah, you might think "oh, she's just another messed up kid who lost their parent" well aren't you wrong. Not only had I lost a parent, I lost my best friend.

My best friend, thank goodness, is not dead. He and his mother had moved away 2 years after my father passed away. Of course that's not the reason why they moved. His mom had gone through a terrible divorce and decided she couldn't stand to ever see his face around here. They moved to Chicago and I haven't been able to get into contact with him ever since then. They left no contact numbers whatsoever just in chance his dad tried to contact them.

—

I got home from school and went straight up to my room. It's just another gloomy day for me. I tried not to be such a negative person but I saw no reason why not to be. My thoughts were interrupted by a knock at my door.

"Honey, are you okay?" My mom asked sincerely.

"Go away mom, I'm fine." I answered straight away, lacking any sort of emotion. My mom opened the door and came down on my bed.

"Listen, I know how hard it has been for you but it's also been hard on me. We need to be here for each other, okay? Sweetie, I love you so much, I want nothing but the best for you." She tried to reassure me.

"I'm so tired of everyone bothering me about this! I said I'm fine! Stop talking about it okay? You know what, I'm done, I can't do this anymore." I got up grabbed my coat and purse, and ran out of the house. Still to this day I don't like talking about the death of my father, it's still a fresh wound. One place I would always go with my father, was my destination.

—

I looked up at the beautiful night sky, mesmerized by enourmous amount of sparkling stars. I think I have fully cooled down now and I regret yelling at my mom like that. But I think that helped so much because i have been bottling in everything for these past years. I never wanted to talk about it.

I checked my phone for the time, 12:32 AM. I climbed off the rock i was sitting on at the park and started walking on the concrete pathway. My hands were shoved deep in my pockets because of the very cold temperature. I barely made it out of the gated park when i nearly got knocked over by a guy looking at his phone.

"Excuse me." I say rather rudely.

"I'm sorr- Grace?" I stopped abruptly and turned around. My mouth was held opened, I-.. I was completely astonished.