Genuine

CHAPTER 4

I entered our office and greeted every worker I meet along the way. They gave me a confused look. Who wouldn't? I don't usually do this. Like prancing my way to my office, humming some tunes just like what you see on musical shows. I just felt like lighter today, even though I haven't slept properly last night.

"You look different today." A hyung stated. "She sounded different too" another hyung added
"You look happy, y/n" Jen unnie said, "I'm always happy." I replied
"I know you y/n. and you know what I mean." She said smiling as she continued what she was doing.

I just smiled and continued my way to my room. Unnie's words made me think. She's right, I felt happier than usual. She's seen right through me, how I laugh even though I'm having a hard day, how I smile even though I want to cry. I'm always happy in their perspective. But now, I think I'm happy for real this time.

Once I sat on my chair, I laid my head on my desk. I haven't slept properly last night; my mind was so noisy recalling my life's recent events. The sleepless night made me finish my paper works and have started working on a new one, even the strongest caffeine can't wake me up right now. A knock on my door came.

"Hm?" I hummed in response. Still eyes closed and head down
"Boss wants to treat us." It was Jen unnie. My head lifted up in an instant, there's nothing better than treats. My blood suddenly rushed in delight, and I don't feel sleepy anymore. I fetch my phone and went with Unnie to Boss' office.
"BossHyung, what's the treat? Lunch is over" I asked
"You'll see. Let's go." He said as he fetches his purse and led us out the building.

Mouth agape, I scanned the building up and down. BossHyung brought us to a Karaoke. It's not like I hate karaoke, I loved it actually. Back in college, I and my friends go to karaoke more often than normal. I liked to sing and wanted to be a singer but I know I wasn't that good to be one. I haven't been in a karaoke since I came to Korea, my vocal chords might be rusty already.

"Why the Karaoke all of a sudden boss?" I asked
"Why not? I used to like karaoke. I just missed those times." He smiled proudly as we entered the building and he paid for the largest room. As we got inside the room, the hyungs were fighting for one microphone. There were two but it was offered to the boss. The fight was calmed, and Jen unnie  got the microphone instead.

All were given a chance to sing, fighting with every turn but will eventually give in to one another. They have been singing alternately for half an hour now, but I haven't had the courage to even touch the song book. It kind of saddened me to be reminded of what I used to love but had to let go in order to have what I am right now.

"Why so silent? You used to be the loudest one." The hyung boomed the room with the mic, averting all their attention at me.I shook my head 'No' and said it was okay and that I'm not fond of singing. Thank God no one insisted and continued to singing... more like shouting.

An English song suddenly played. Everyone was flustered not knowing whose turn is it this time. No one also seemed to fight for the mic. And they all turned to someone they knew could sing English...Me.

"I guess even the karaoke wants you to sing." Boss hyung said. I suspect him planning this.
"We can just skip and proceed to the next song." I suggested. But everyone didn't do anything and were expecting for me to sing.
"Come on, we won't judge. We're already here, It would be a waste if you can't experience this." A hyung said.
"It's okay; I have been to one before." I reasoned, "Then you have experience, no reason to not sing." He retorted. I gave up, there's no harm in doing it anyway.

We exited the building, feeling refreshed. It feels like all the stress that has been pent up was released by screaming our lungs out inside the karaoke room. I stretched my body, arms up in the air. It felt good to have sung again, it didn't rust but there's still a little dust to clean.

"Wah, we should do this more often. I want to hear y/n's wailing more" BossHyung said and we all laughed as we walked back to our office.

Night came and I'm on my way back home. I'm almost at my street's corner when I'm about to approach a convenient store. So I decided to stop by. I still have food on my fridge but I'm too lazy to cook. I have no one to cook for besides myself anyway. I was slurping my cup of ramen when I heard a familiar song coming from the store's television. There I saw BTS's music video being played on mtv and it reminded me of my schedule for another day with them tomorrow. The thought made me giddy and finished the remaining soup leaving the cup spotless.

I left the store after I finished eating sausage. And now I'm standing in front of my apartment door. I suddenly felt homesick seeing no one as I entered my apartment.  It wasn't small but it isn't that big either. Just a space for living room, dining area and a tiny kitchen, a restroom, my room, and a guest room in case of an emergency guest. I have a balcony since I'm on the 10th floor of the building; this is actually my favorite place. For some reason, the wind from the balcony calms my mind.

My excitement for tomorrow was tempered by the loneliness I was feeling after seeing an empty home, if this can still be called home. I've always thought of going back home but my job can't be left alone. Yes I am allowed to control my time but a time worth a country away is just too much. I can't risk being so far away while my work has a huge chance of having emergencies. Setting my sad thoughts aside, I turned on my shower and washed those bad vibes away. After I change into my pajamas and finishing my nightly skin care routine, I went straight to sleep to ready myself for tomorrow.

I went to the agency at a time stated on my schedule. Some staffs are already waiting with PD-nim at his office. As soon I've entered the office, they ordered me to hand in my glasses to attach some micro camera just like what PD-nim has instructed and went to the practice room with the rest of the staff.

I entered the room and saw them still practicing. As I was about to find some chair to sit, a video man called me over while installing a camera at the center in front of the boys. I walked towards him and he handed me another video camera.

"[KR] Can you film them? The boys want to post a dance practice video. I'm not done fixing this one yet." he pleaded and gestured to the camera stand
"[KR] oh okay sure." I replied not really sure about it.
"[KR] you can film anyway you like as long as it's watchable. They're just doing some 'Bangtan bomb'" he assured me. Just then, the director called for the video-man and he told the director about our situation, and the director agreed. The boys seemed flustered about the news as they positioned themselves to perform their old song called 'War of Hormones'. I readied the camera and the song started to play.

< Watch War of Hormones Dance Practice>

That was just one of the few privileges I got while working here at Bighit aside from the unlimited interactions with them. But the boys were much more interactive back on our first meeting compared today, I wonder if something happened. But I'm still not that confident to ask any of them. Right after we were done shooting, the boys scattered immediately to drink some water and some just lay done in the corner. What did I expect? That they'd acknowledge me and tell me I did a great job filming? I think I was just too attention seeking. I smiled it away and went to give the camera back and did some chair stacking afterwards even though it was unnecessary.

My back was facing them while I did the stacking and I heard the boys' whispers ad if debating or maybe just bickering. I didn't hear it well because I myself was debating with my thoughts too, 'maybe I can just approach them, and it's my job to converse with them anyways.' I came to a decision as I stacked another chair and turned around to face the boys' direction.

"AH! SHI------T!" I was about to curse in korean when I became face-to-face with Hoseok who was suddenly standing just inches away from me.
"[KR] WHAT-WHAT-WHAT?!" he screamed. He was frightened by my reaction only realizing what's happening after we basically stared at each other with shocked faces and both of us bust into a long laugh. Meanwhile, at the corner of my eyes, I saw the others peeking at us wondering what was going on. But I don't know what's going on either.
"What is it JHope? Do you need any help?" I asked after we calmed our hurting stomach from laughing.
"uhm... I don't speak English but... I want to be friends with you." he said trying his best to speak in English while wearing a smile that could light up the whole universe.