Never Look Back

Chapter Eleven

Sam

I was in a strange house. The light was off, but I could still see the faint outline of dancing ballerinas on the pink wallpaper. Toys littered the floor along with coloring books and crayons. The door was cracked, peeking a sliver of light from a hallway full of strange voices. I followed them.

Unfamiliar faces paced from kitchen to the living room, all of them in blue uniforms with badges. One lady with pale skin and freckles looked at me and screamed. I was scared and tried to run to my safe place. Something tripped me, and I landed in a pool of red sticky stuff. Suddenly I was yanked up, up, up into the air and whisked off into the kitchen. The lady was back and she kept asking, "What is your name, hun?"

I nearly fell off the bed I jumped up so fast. Did I just..remember something?

"Sam! You're awake!" Ethan smiled as he ran into the room. His hair was damp as if he had just showered and he was in a fresh t-shirt coupled with some nicely fitted jeans, "How are you feeling?"

"Eh, I'm alive at least. How about Austin? And Jade?" I asked, trying not to wince when he touched my shoulder. Austin was so brave during it all. I don't think I would have made it through if he hadn't been there to keep me strong. He probably didn't tell the others, but what Carlos did to him mentally was a lot harder than anything he did to me physically.

"Travis is with him right now. They're both alright, and so is Jade." Ethan chuckled, "She shot that bastard in his ass, his junk, and even gave his brother a bullet to the brain. Remind me to never get on her bad side."

"Good." I could tell he wanted me to explain what I went through to him. He stared at me with expectant eyes, but I looked away, asking "Where are we?" The walls and floor were concrete like we were in a basement or an underground storage unit. Plus it smelled like moldy cheese in there, and that shit was worse than a skunk!

"Sorry ma'am, but that's classified information." Jade's voice rang from the doorway, "If we told you, we'd have to kill ya."

"You look like hell." I told her with a smile. Her blonde hair was pulled back in a ponytail, and she was wearing a sleeveless t-shirt that revealed her arm tattoo and three purplish wounds. She simply shrugged, saying, "Its an occupational hazard. They got the bullets out, at least. Gerdier said he'd even make them into a necklace for me! Wouldn't that be one helluva conversation starter?"

Jade looked as if she wanted to say something in private, but Ethan made no effort to budge.

"Ethan, would you mind leaving us to talk for a bit? I've got to talk to her about girl things." I asked my boyfriend sheepishly. Least. I think he's my boyfriend. He didn't seem to object, and walked out of the room with a slight nod.

"Got something on your mind?" Jade asked, plopping down on the bed beside me.

I couldn't keep the tears contained anymore. I could still feel his hands on me. I still felt the pain buzzing though my body. And Jade understood. She didn't ask for explanations, she didn't try to tell me stupid comforting shit like 'it'll be okay' or 'you'll get through this.' She just sat with me and let me cry into her arms.

"How do you deal with it all?" I asked her, "How can someone get over this?"

She looked older and a lot more tired than normal, like she did when we were visiting Grace. She sighed, "There's never getting over trauma like that, but with time, the wounds may heal and the scars may fade. It's up to you to decide whether or not you're going to let it destroy you, or make you stronger."

After a while more of silence, she continued, "I want you to look at something." Jade hopped off the bed and began to pull up the back of her shirt, "My wounds healed, but my scars never faded. It took me a long time to be able to accept the fact I couldn't change what happened to me, but when I did, I ultimately became a better person."