Constrained // Phan

My Worst Fear

Dan POV:

Word Count: 988

Traumatize: verb // subject to lasting shock as a result of an emotionally disturbing experience or physical injury.

"I gotta admit, your boyfriend's pretty hot," Chris whispers in my ear.

That sets me off the edge.

I use all the strength I can muster and punch him right in the nose.

I can tell that's what he wanted. He wanted to get me angry and have me do something so he would have an excuse to torture me more.

Soon after I am taken to Room 214, which I've heard rumors about.

Its a room that people don't want to end up in from what I've heard.

The room is almost completely darkened, just like the room I was in before.

They strap me to a table with a bright light hanging above me.

I hear whispers from the guards as we wait for Chris to arrive.

"I feel bad for the kid," one says.

"Yeah, this is gonna fuck with him."

"Are you ready to have some fun?" Chris asks as he walks into the room.

He picks up a syringe and injects it into my neck without hesitation.

I squirm against the restraints, not wanting that mysterious, black liquid in my body.

But it's no use, and I start to lose consciousness. The last thing I see is Chris hovering over me, his hideous, malicious smirk on his face. I am going to kill him one day.

I then daze off, leaving my freezing cold body and traveling into my mind.

What I didn't know is what to come would be the worst torture of all...

                                      <><><>

Suddenly, I am in my high school back in London. I look around, very confused. How did I get back here? And where's Phil?

I start to walk around, but when I round the corner, I see Phil pinning Chris against the wall, kissing him passionately.

"PHIL?" I exclaim, incredibly angry.

He stops for a moment and looks me in the eyes, no remorse or love for me left in them.

He continues kissing Chris, who looks like he's been wanting this. Phil starts to thrust against him, and they go into the janitor's closet next to them and begin undressing.

What the fuck?

                                   <><><>

Suddenly, I am in a different location. I'm in a dark, messy house with beer bottles and cigarette butts everywhere.

This is always what I imagined my dad's house would look like.

"Disappointment," I hear from the kitchen doorway in front of me.

I look up to see my dad, who I've only seen one photo of.

The rough stubble and endless bags under his eyes reveals that time has not been good to him. He looks tired and angry.

"Dad?" I ask, wiping the tears off my face from before.

"I'm ashamed to say that I am your father," he sighs.

"What do you mean?"

"Look at you. You're weak. And a coward."

"Wh-What?" I stammer.

"You're weak. You can't protect your boyfriend. You cheated on him. You died. And Phil was the one who saved you."

"Like you haven't made mistakes? Where were you all my life, Dad? You left us! I didn't have a father growing up!"

"At least I didn't kill my sister!" he exclaims.

"H-How do you know about that?" I stammer, my voice croaking.

"You killed my daughter! You killed Lillian!" he screams.

"It was an accident! I didn't mean to! I didn't..." 

"You killed your sister?" I hear someone ask to my right.

I look over and see a scared Phil, his eyes filled with hate and disappointment.

"No, I..."

"You know what you did, Dan," my mom says to my left. She looks as if she's been crying.

"You killed my daughter," she says, the same sadness in her voice as when my dad said it.

"You killed me," I hear someone say from behind me. I haven't heard that voice in years.

I turn around to see Lillian, blood staining her white dress.

"Lillian?" I whimper.

"Yes, Dan. Your sister. I was only six! Six years old! And you ended my life because of your carelessness!"

"I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to! I..." I begin to walk towards her.

"Get away from her!" Phil yells as he pushes me onto the couch.

They all start to shouting. How I messed up, how I deserve to die.

I cover my ears, shutting my eyes tightly, trying to not remember something that I wish to forget, rocking back and forth on the couch and crying.

"Stop! Stop yelling! Just please stop!" I scream at the top of my lungs.

"How could I ever love you?" I hear Phil ask.

"I hate you, Dan," my mom confesses.

"I trusted you!" my sister yells.

"I'm glad I left your sorry ass," my Dad says.

I continue to rock back and forth on the couch, hands on my ears, tears dripping off my face.

"I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry..." I sob.

The yelling simultaneously stops, and I wake up on the table back at the lab.

Chris is above me, laughing.

"That was extremely entertaining to watch," he says, releasing my restraints.

He halts the guards when they begin to walk over to me.

"I'll take him back to his cell." he says.

As we're walking back, he starts chuckling.

"You were a mess, crying and screaming. The things you were saying... sounds like you've done some bad shit," he laughs.

"What was that?" I ask softly.

"Your worst fears and your deepest regrets," he says.

"I might have put the first one in there, but the second one was all you and your mind."

He drags me back to my cell and throws me into it. Phil comes over to me, but I can barely comprehend what is going on.

I'm traumatized.

Chris has broken me.

I cried writing this chapter. Wow.

<3