Journal Entry's

Monday, June 26th, 2017

I am currently in my room. At the hospital though. I am alone now. My roommate left today. I guess I'm kinda happy cause I really wasn't feeling much comfortable around her. But now I'm alone. And I don't know if to be scared about the fact that I'm sleeping alone. I am always scared. But for some reason I am feeling comfortable and safe and confident. I don't know what it is. Or probably because I know God is with me and he won't let anything happen to me.

I wrote a letter to my mom. I know that's the best way I have always communicated with her and so, I know that I will be able to express myself in writing. I'm hoping everything goes well tomorrow. She said she was gonna come visit.

Today ended good I guess. Cause the day went really chill. I've been calm. I've been drawing and painting. I made a drawing for Said. I guess, I hope, he actually does call me or try to reach me. But I don't wanna get overwhelmed over whether he really likes me or not. Or if he will call or not. Or if this thing is really real or not. You know? But imma just not stress about it. Try to, I guess. I don't feel sleepy at all tonight. So I guess I will be awake for some long darn time. I hope I will keep the music. So that way I can entertain myself. I don't know. It feels kinda good to be having the room to myself. Plus I'm the only one who got to level 2, I earned it. I deserve to listen to what I want on it. But if someone comes, I can share, take turns. I keep on hearing this song, "Issues", and I really like it. Cause I feel a little like what they say in the song. Like, " You don't, judge me, cause if you do, baby, I will judge you too...cause I got issues, you got them too..." I guess those lines I can mostly identify with. Cause I get annoyed when people call out my problems but I know my problems but they do too, so they shouldn't be taking.

And I don't know what time it is. But I like listening to music. And I'll keep listening to it, till they take it away. I don't know, but music just calms me. Makes me sing and dance. And here alone, listening to it, I can sign anyway I want, dance silly and no one will judge me. That's why I want a radio for my room s for I can be like this at home too. I find it weird that this time I wrote so little compared to other days. But I guess that's good. Cause all im doing is writing my thoughts down. Like if I were talking to someone. But I'm just writing. But its still soothing. "I'm only human after all...don't put your blame on me..." I like that song too. "Oh Na na. Just be careful. Na na. Love ain't simple. Promise me no promises."