Boyfriend

2

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐠𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭!

✻ ✻ ✻

Monday, first day of college

I woke up way too early due to being anxious. It was just my first time, away from home, at a strange place. Everything seemed so terrifying.

Thankfully, I woke up early enough to get myself some nice breakfast. A delicious croissant with some coffee. The world seemed so much better right after the coffee landed in my stomach.

I was sitting in my room, reading the book I brought from my home. I had so many favorite books but I didn't like re-reading them. There was something wrong with me.

When I looked at my watch, it was time to leave. I grabbed my stuff, locked the door and slowly started wandering towards campus. The cold wind hit my cheeks who soon turned crimson red.

I walked into my first class looking like a cherry. But not many people were present yet, which gave me some time to get back to my natural color.

I thought of sitting in the front but my mates back home thought that makes me a goody-two-shoe and if I don't stop behaving like that, I might never make friends.

So, I decided to sit in the back. Plus, I'd have my privacy from everyone. I sat down on the seat near the window and smiled looking outside. The color of the weather today was very cold yet so mesmerizing.

Soon the class filled and the bell rang. My first class was philosophy. The professor entered and waited for us to calm down. He was about to open his mouth to greet us, when someone entered through that door again.

“I'm so sorry”, I heard a very low voice, but it did give away that it was a boy.

I could hear him coming closer, until the sound of his tracks stopped at the table in the middle. He wasn't sitting alone, but it did feel like he was lonely.

Well, it shouldn't matter to me anyways. Our first assignment was to write what philosophy is according to our point of view. I really liked the topic for the introduction hour.

When I was about to walk out the door, my shoulder bumped into another one. I winced even though it didn't hurt but I felt something strain for a moment

“I'm sorry”, I heard the same voice again. I don't know what it was, but there was something about this person that attracted me a lot.

Even though I didn't dare to look back at him. Maybe because I didn't want to create a mess for myself again. I came here for a new start and I wasn't going to butcher it for some guy.

My next class was in an hour, so I walked into the lawn and set down on the dry grass. It was about to rain and I didn't mind. I pulled out my phone and plugged in my headphones.

Everything was fine, until I convinced myself to calm my mother. And it was okay, until she didn't pick up, no matter how many times I dialed her number.

Weren't my parents the best at abandoning their child? Or was it safety? Whatever they thought they were doing, it was hurting me.

My phone vibrated, it was a message from her. My father was still alive, well until now. I stood up and started walking to my next.

But couldn't find the room and I was getting late. Due to my not talking much habit, I couldn't ask anyone. I just stood there like a freak. Until this girl walked past me and then came back, only to ask me if everything was okay.

Somehow she was in my class and I finally let out a breath of relief. I sat down in the last row once again. But this time with her on my side.

The girl seemed Asian, to be specified Korean, I guess. But I didn't dare to say it out loud, in case my remark came out a bit racist.

She kept smiling at me, so there could be no harm when someone is offering themselves to you. I decided to ask her if she wanted to have lunch with me and she agreed. We walked into the cafeteria, only to find the whole school sitting there.

It was kinda scary, so many faces. And all of them could dislike you if they want to. We grabbed our food and sat down on the stairs outside the cafeteria. She told me that her name was Bae.

I loved her name, not because it was an acronym for “before anyone else”. It sounded so cute, just like her. I never could've imagined to have found someone so quickly.

And that wasn't even the end, Bae knew other people she introduced me to. Some of them were from my county. They spoke my language and I couldn't help but beam from happiness.

Maybe I wasn't as lonely as I had thought. Maybe changed was good even if it meant giving up on what you have. Because what you lose, can be found.

I had no idea at that time, that I was making bonds for life. That these people would help me get through thick and thin.

I was glad to have found them. I couldn't believe myself that I was actually that lucky. When I came back to my dorm room, I decided to work on my decorations.

I was hanging the curtains when someone knocked. I opened the door, only to find the secretary standing there.

She had come to tell me that my roommate was going to show up in two days. And I didn't know how I felt about that. I mean, I was doing fine on my own. But then again, it wasn't like I could decide.

So, when she left, I got back to hanging up my curtains. After that I placed a tiny picture of my parents on my bedside table.
_______________________________________

Amna xx