Pisanthraphobia (H2OVanoss and Others)

Chapter 13

Evan knew his old apartment would be the first place they looked. They would probably check Tyler's house next, and then contact everyone else he knew. The most strategic place to go was somewhere close by but discreet, and he had a place in mind.

His contacts had sent him directions to an old barn they used to film YouTube videos in; abandoned and not registered on GPS. It was the perfect place to get his life back on track.

He was technically on the run. He wasn't a prisoner (though he may as well have been), but he was technically mentally insane according to legal paperwork. Luckily, he had Tyler and Craig on his side; he knew he would make it through this.

He found the barn with limited help from crouching outside McDonald's for wifi, and found the keypad. It lit up green when he typed in his code, and he was able to open the door and slip through.

It was pitch black when he entered, completely still and silent. Pushing past his adrenaline filled nerves, he searched the wall for a light switch. It took a while to find, and despite its unusual button controls he was able to light up the warehouse.

It was filled with random paraphernalia, like costumes and a giant Christmas tree, and there was a burnt cow patterned couch off to the side. He found a blow up mattress that didn't seem too ruined and collapsed upon it.

Being in a warehouse like this made him nervous, but he pushed past it before any bad memories could invade his mind. He pulled out his laptop and spent a few minutes connecting to a private internet server, getting a secure connection without being detected.

Opening FireFox, he typed in a URL and waited. The blue logo came up, and he paused, wondering what would happen after he clicked that button. Though he knew he wasn't insane, he was still mentally unstable after being trapped in that place for so long.

He had learned in school about past wars, and about past torture methods. He had always thought water boarding was the worst, being unable to imagine his own threat closing against his will, but he had never considered the 'white room'.

That place was behind him now, but he felt as though he would have dreams, like the ones he would wake up to years ago. But those were childish, about horror movies and scary stories, but this was real.

Once again, he knew that his life wasn't normal, but after all the time he had to think, his opinion changed. He no longer craved the usual, average life he had before. This fractured reality was the only thing he wanted, despite the darkness that followed him.

He thought of those blue eyes, more clear and deep than the blue of his screen, and clicked. A soft ringing noise bled though and echoed off the warehouse walls, and within seconds his computer hummed.

The Skype logo was replaced by the stunned and disbelieving faces of Tyler and Craig, both crammed together on his screen. His eyes watered even though he had used all his tears up long ago, and he knew it was all worth it.

"Hey guys..."

His voice cracked, and his friends' own eyes became watery as they took in the sight of him after so long. He saw the glinting silver chains around their necks, and the warmth in his chest grew.

"Hey, Ev. Long time no see."

Tyler smiled that crooked grin, and Evan vowed to himself that he would show his gratitude the next time they met. Craig stayed silent, leaning his head on Tyler's shoulder looking as though he was about to cry.

The feelings were almost too much, and after planning a meeting, Evan telling them he'd be getting another phone, they ended the call. Evan lay back with a bounce against the mattress, using the silence to calm his fiery inner turmoil.

He didn't know how to feel, and he let his emotions fade as tiredness replaced them. Reluctantly getting up, he dragged the mattress behind a giant square of wood leaning against the wall. He strained to get the broken couch to cover one opening, and settled back down.

His location was secure for now, but he didn't want to take any chances. He didn't know what he was up against, and there was a small chance that whoever they were they would leave him alone.

The plan was simple, and not really a plan at all. Based on videos they knew Lui and Daithi were with Brian and Brock, and they were planning on meeting up nearby the apartment first.

After they had time to catch up, they would find the other four and break the news to them. Together they would find out where to go next, and Evan would finally reconstruct his life.

It wouldn't be perfect, but it would be alright. He just wanted to be okay again.  Maybe he would start up YouTube again, under a different name. He could add subtitles and take his own voice out of the videos, posing as mute or just camera shy.

But for right now, he was satisfied to start slow, to take first steps on legs that had been broken again and again. His friends were his support, and he could almost feel Jonathan next to him, as though his weight and warmth lay beside his own.

He didn't dream that night, but he slept deeper and longer than he had in months since everything had changed. His energy renewed, he grabbed his meagre belongings with a new feeling coursing through him.

There was trepidation, but with it was courage. He would never back down, no matter what life threw at him. It was started when he began playing hockey, his coach making him question who he was, but it had stayed with him.

Soon, he would reemerge with new wings, armour of perseverance, and a shield of belief in himself and his friends.