the only one that stayed.

two

A few weeks later, the girls and Perrie were set to play a gig for their four years of being together in New York. Perrie was still completely broken, her heart feeling numb at this point. She had moved in with Jade for the time being until she had the energy to even look up a new place to live. Jade even thought that it would be too soon for her to even be alone with herself. She might not be able to handle it, since she's just been a crying, ball of mess for weeks.

Perrie was putting on a fake smile all day because it was four years of being with Little Mix, she should be happy. None of what is happening should be happening, she shouldn't be treated so poorly that she was put into this funk that caused her to lose sleep and appetite. She hasn't eaten a full meal in a few days. The person that helps her with her diet checked her weight a few days ago and it's gone down a few pounds. She lost a few pounds in only a few days. She joked about how it's good that she's losing weight but he didn't think so, making Perrie pretend that it was okay and brushed it off.

Over this course of time, she thought about all of the times in their relationship where she felt exactly like this — besides the constant feeling of being empty and alone even when she was in a room full of people. She remembered a specific time, where she had thought of surprising him with his favorite dinner, but things went wrong.

She had fixed up his favorite meal and placed a few candles on the table. She even put on some nice lingerie underneath her clothes just in case anything happened afterwards. She sat down at the table, checking the time every few minutes and staring at the front door. She texted him a few times, questioning mostly if he was okay and safe since he said he would be home by now. Her mind wandered to the worst imaginable — did he get in a car crash, did he get hurt, did he find someone prettier? She brushed off all of the thoughts of infidelity and just worried for his safety.

Time passed even more. The food was now cold and would have to be microwaved to be enjoyable. Her eyes were covered in her mascara since she started sobbing. Her heart was aching at this point, her thoughts flying through her mind so fast she could barely hear them. Her nose was so stuffed, it irritated her to no end.

The front door finally opened, a sober, okay Zayn walking inside of it. His eyes wandered from the table set with food and candles to his fiancé's mascara running face. "Hi," is all he could say. Perrie's anger was rising, her fists clenched as she stood up, ready to hit his chest until he could feel the same amount of heartache she was feeling.

"I cooked all of this for you!" she shouted, her face turning red with anger. She swore that she could see red from how much anger was flowing through her veins. "And you come home, not a few minutes late, but hours late? What the fuck is wrong with you? You had me worried si—"

Before she could even finish her sentence, she could see a dark 'bruise' on his neck. Her heart felt like it stopped beating for a few minutes. Everything was in slow motion, to her eyes seeing the hickey to him placing his hand over it.

She didn't even say anything for a while, just stared at him with glossy eyes. And then she smiled, the most forced, fake smile that she has ever given to anyone. "I'm going to sleep in the guest room."

And then she left to the guest room, where she cried herself to sleep. The saddest part is that Zayn didn't even try to go and talk to her, he just microwaved the food that she had made and watched tv in the living room.

She felt herself begin to tear up but she blinked them away because she doesn't want to cry just before a show.

—

They were performing a song that's going to be on the new album, Get Weird. The song was clearly written about a relationship that was toxic and not working. That song was The End. Perrie was trying her very best to not burst into tears because every word they had to sing was reminding her of her and Zayn's relationship.

Jade was watching her carefully as it finally got to her part.

"I won't be missing...missing you,

And no I can't love you, the way I used to do..

And love isn't fair—"

And Perrie bursted out into tears, the feeling taking over her like a wave. She looked into the audience for a moment and saw all of the worried faces, but she was so blinded by the sadness that took over her that she just sobbed into Jade's shoulder. The girls huddled around her and held her tightly, giving her reassuring words to calm her down.

"It's okay, babe," Jade mumbled into her ear, giving her a small kiss to her cheek, which wipes away a tear that was falling down it. "He doesn't matter anymore. It's okay."

Jess and Leigh-Anne proceeded to calm the crowd and give a bullshit explanation that they've been tired so that's why she's feeling this way. Jade stayed close and watched her facial expressions carefully, which was still in a constant frown with tears falling down slowly. "It'll be okay." She moved a piece of hair from her face and gave her a reassuring look.

"I'm sorry," Perrie mumbled into the mic, her voice sounding broken. She didn't even try to give a fake smile, she just looked out into the audience. They all clapped for her and gave her big smiles. A few 'I love you Perrie!'s came at her which made her feel calmer, but deep inside she felt like her heart was being squeezed.