About to miss everything (Kellic)

Chapter 1: So maybe I'm not ok

I'm not oh fucking kay

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Well shit.

It's so late, why do I always oversleep!

Shit. Shit. Shit, shit, shit!

Why does hell (school) have to exist. It really gets in the way of my habit of going to bed late and waking up even later. Jumping out of bed, throwing on clothes, and rushing out the front door has somehow became my morning routine at this point. After scrambling around for a few minutes I begin my walk to school.

Walking outside in fall is so peaceful. The soft crunch of leaves accompanied with the soft breeze soothes me as I walk. If I focus on this feeling maybe school won't be so bad.

As I enter the school the feeling of calm smashes into a million pieces.

Oh my god. Calm down. It's fine. It's just people, you can at least pretend to be fine. Just walk normal. How does one walk normal. I swear I'm walking weird. Is he looking at me? Why would he be looking at me? Am I breathing weird? Just breathe Kellin stop being an idiot!

"Hey Kellin."

"Oh! Hey...hey Jack."

Thankfully Jack managed to break me out of my anxious trance and brought me back to the present.

"How was your weekend dude?"

"It was a solid 2/10 man. I'm so fucking tired."

I wasn't lying. I had a shitty weekend. I was sad and I had homework that I forced myself to do so I could keep my grades up.

"Dude, you shouldn't put so much pressure on yourself! One day you are just gonna collapse under the pressure."

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever dude. I'm gonna fucking 'collapse under the pressure' my ass."

I made sure to add air quotes for emphasis.

"How was your weekend?"

"The usual. I played video games and avoided my homework."

That made me smile. Jack was always so laid back it was refreshing compared to my uptight state. Sometimes I wished I could be like him, but I would never get anything done.

"Sounds like a wild weekend." I chuckle sarcastically "Anyways, I'm heading to class, see you in English?"

"Yep, see you then." He said before he turned and walked towards his class.

Sadly my schedule has gym first, which in my opinion, is absolute garbage. I'm barely ready to think in the morning let alone actually exercise. Grabbing my gym clothes from my locker I made my way down to the gym.

I arrived to the change room first, as usual. I really didn't like changing in front of others because I was very self-conscious. People looking at you and judging you was the worst. But you can't not wear shorts and a t-shirt to gym without getting weird looks. I get changed while being extra careful of where my boxers are hoping they cover my hips fully incase anyone walks in. After I get changed I sit and play music on my phone waiting for the rest of the class to show up.

Other people show up and begin talking with their friends. I really don't like many people in this class so I try to stay by myself because they are so judgmental. As gym class is starting we start heading out of the change room waiting for the teacher to show up.

"Yo, Kellin!" Alex says as he clamps his hand on my shoulder.

I shift away uncomfortable with the touch.