Scars. |✔️|

Chapter 5: The Sleeves

I wake up in the embrace of James. My head hurts like hell, but it isn't as bad as yesterday. I turn my body around and see James asleep with his arm around my waist. He is even sexy when he is asleep. I slowly take his arm away from my waist so I don't wake him up. I get out of bed and walk to the bathroom while holding on to my IV pole.

While I am walking toward the bathroom I look down trying not to trip on the cord and realize that I don't have long pants on. Just shorts. Fuck. I run to the bathroom and slam the door not caring if I wake James up. Did he see them? What if he saw them? My eyes sting and tears start to flow down my face.

These bruises and shit are ruining my life and they have been since I was little. I always wondered what my life would be like if I didn't have all of these goddamn...

"LIYAH! Are you okay? Are you crying?" I hear James say outside the door.

"Yeah I'm fine, my head just hurts," I lie. I mean my head does hurt but that's not the reason I'm crying.

"Open the door so I can help you," he says while jiggling the doorknob.

"I'M FINE," I scream. "Just... go. Please."

"Liyah, just let me--"

"NO. LEAVE ME ALONE!" An uncomfortable silence fills the air for a moment, then I hear footsteps walking away and the door slam.

My mind is telling me to get the hell up and run after him, but my body isn't responding. More hot tears fall down my face. I want to just scream, cry, and disappear all at the same time.

I hear the door to the room open up again and I look up, hoping that it's James. But I'm sadly disappointed when I hear my nurse, Ms. Liz, say, "Aaliyah, are you okay?"

Ms. Liz and I️ have been nurse and patient for as long as I️ can remember. I️ have been i️n this hospital basically a thousand times in my entire left. She became my nurse when she had to pop my dislocated knee back in place. I️ wouldn't let anyone else do it but her. We have been together ever since.

"Yeah I'm fine. My head just hurts," I say back.

"Oh okay. Open the door so I can help you back to your bed," she says.

"Um actually I'm going to use the bathroom really quick. But can you do me a favor?" I️ say sniffing the entire time.

"Yes. Of course sweetheart. What do you need?"

"Do you have any long pants that I️ can wear? I'm cold," I️ say hoping that she says yes.

"Um I️ can find some for you. We usually don't like to give patients long pants in the summer because it is already hot enough as it is. You sure you want them?"

"Yes. Please," I️ say i️n some kind of begging tone.

"Okay. But when I️ get back I️ need you in the bed. You should be resting right now. Your concussion is MAJOR!" She says putting emphasis on "major".

"Okay. I️ got it," I️ say back.

Once I️ hear the door close I️ get up and look myself in the mirror. I️ don't know why this is all happening to me. First my dad, then the fucking concussion, and now James.

I️ walk toward the door and unlock it. I️ climb into bed and I️ look for the remote to the TV. When I️ turn around I️ see the remote on the nightstand on top of a journal. I️ reach for the journal and I️ see that on the front it has James D. Carter inscribed on it. I️ know I️ shouldn't open it but something is telling me to. I️ open the journal and I️ flip through the pages until I️ see my name and a beautiful drawing of me. I️ start to cry again and I️ instantly feel like shit.

My crying session is cut short by someone knocking on my door.

"One second," I️ say while taking a tissue and clean up my tears.

"Okay. You can come in."

"Hey sweetie. Here you go," Liz says as she hands me the long black pants. "All we had was black."

"This is perfect. Thank you," I️ say while putting the pants on under the covers.

"Your welcome. You okay? You look like you've been crying? And them ain't "my head hurts" tears those are heartbreak tears."

I️ don't understand how old people can literally sense every little thing.

"It's just... I️ think I️ just lost someone really important. But I'm fine it's whatever," I️ say sighing.

"You have done that shit since you were little. Saying everything is fine when it isn't. Stop doing that. You know that you need to talk it out and not hold that stuff in," she says while walking out the door.

"I️ know. It's just hard," I️ say.

"I️ know. But you gotta try. I'll be back to check on you in a little bit," she says closing the door.

When she closes the door I️ grab the remote and the turn the TV to some random show. On the screen is a couple that are in love on a date. I️ look down at James's journal and I️ see the drawing of me.

What did I️ do?

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Hope you enjoyed chapter 5! I️ know it took a little bit, but cheer and school have been whooping my butt.

Stay tuned for Chapter 6: Help Me Please... coming soon!

- Nadia ❤️