truth :･ﾟ☆✧ fillie (slow updates)

chapter four ➳ stitches

"we're holding on to laugh again someday,"

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finn's pov:

i went to the floor, picking up the blade again, only for millie to take it.

she held it in her hand, looking at me with the saddest eyes.

i knew she didn't understand, and i now realized that i didn't either.

i wanted her out of my life for what she did, and when i kissed her that made it so much harder.

cutting was my relief, i had been clean for two weeks now- emphasis on had.

but i now came to reality.

why am i stopping myself from loving someone who loves me back?

"y-you can talk to me, it's going to be alright finn," she spoke, setting the razor down on the bathroom counter.

instead of looking at the pills and other drugs sitting there, she looked at me.

she held contact and i felt another tear leave my eye.

god dammit, my therapist was right.

i still love her.

as tempting as it was to grab the blade, she sat down on the bathroom floor making me resist standing back up.

i got flashbacks of the news with my dad killing himself.

i remember her hugging me and sharing a kiss, as we sat on the floor forever.

without thinking, i pulled her into a huge hug.

now a days i wouldn't show any emotion really, i always drank or smoked it off.

but with millie i didn't care.

"you know i- i still love you right," she said softly, as we were still in the hug.

that made me happy really hearing it, but at the same time it broke my heart a little.

i'm not sure she would still love me after she found out what i did when she was gone.

i couldn't even love, near like myself.

that's the thing though, right now she didn't know.

"i don't think i ever stopped loving you," i reply, quietly, trying my best to sound normal from how drunk i was.

i felt cold tears on my back, and i pulled out of the hug and she was smiling.

i smiled back, it was hard not to.

"you need a ride home?" i asked, as we both stared at each other.

"what?" i questioned, as she laughed without answering.

"you just care about me still, i'm okay now but it's really sweet i guess. how about you?" she replied, the smile still on her face.