the thrill of first love ♔

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cb × ar

Everyone knew that Christian Borle never failed to give a great performance regardless of what character he was playing. Whether it was Tom, Marvin, Willy, Emmett, the Black Stache, the Bard... Christian always nailed it.

On his special day, everyone in the Chocolate Factory family expected nothing less from him. He still was as great as ever, having just turned a year older. Still very friendly, sang extraordinarily and acted without a flaw. They even celebrated him backstage before their show began, and the man was as humble and thankful as ever.

No one really knew how Christian felt as he performed each night at the Lunt-Fontanne Theater. He always said that he's grateful to be part of the Broadway community and happy to be playing such a great character, but nobody really knew if he was either sad, angry or anything other than happy onstage on the inside. Basically, it had to be believed to be seen.

When the first act of Charlie ended at his birthday performance, Christian quickly made his way to his dressing room, a habit he's developed every intermission. It was a normal action, but one person in particular noticed how he avoided eye contact and moved very swiftly. He followed his path until he stopped at the foot of his door and heard a click on the other side. Funny. He never locks his door, he thought, knocking before thinking.

"Christian? Are you okay?" Jake Ryan Flynn asked, leaning an ear onto the door. Silence was the only response at first, but it was then followed by shuffling of feet and the doorknob moving.

"Oh, hey, Jake! Uh, yes, I am. What makes you think otherwise?"

"You're a very good actor, Christian, but I just a gut feeling that you're not having a very happy birthday."

The 44 year-old stared at the young boy in front of him. In a matter of seconds, with a bit of hesitation, he gently pushed him inside his dressing room before looking around the hallway and shutting the door.

Jake was confused at first, but the confusion transformed into worry as Christian started breaking down. It wasn't normal to see such a great man look so vulnerable, and the child didn't know how to react. Instead of speaking, he wrapped his arms around him, patiently waiting for Christian to speak again as the man's body racked with sobs. He had been holding his sadness in this whole time.

It took a while for Christian to calm down. The sadness the man felt must have been extreme, seeing how emotional he just got.

"Uh, t-thank you, Jake. I'm sorry you had to see me like this-"

"It's no problem. At all. I'm here for you if you need anything."

"You're such a nice boy, you know that?"

Jake rolled his eyes with a smile at Christian's comment. "And you're a nice man who shouldn't be so sad at a great day like this."

The young actor unwrapped his arms around his friend before Christian went to pick his phone up. After moments of scrolling through his gallery, he eventually pressed a photo.

"That's me and m-my fiancé." He explained.

Jake stared at the photo in disbelief. Christian was nervous, thinking that boy was probably homophobic, but was definitely surprised when he spoke.

"That can't be you. That man has hair!" The child joked, Christian letting a breath out before scoffing out a laugh.

"Anyway," Christian sniffled. "I haven't seen him in real life since June. We're both so busy with our projects and it hurts to wake up everyday without h-him by my side. We video chat constantly, but it just isn't the same with him t-traveling and me stuck here in NYC, alone. I haven't gotten any news from him for the past few days and its gnawing at me from the inside. I feel so miserable spending my birthday without him and I m-miss him so much, Jake..."

The boy embraced the man one more time. Christian was on the verge of tears again, but he knew that crying wasn't the best idea at the moment since he would probably end up looking horrible in the second act of the show if he did so. He took deep breaths to calm himself as Jake spoke.

"I think that you should just remember how much he loves you and how much you love him. That should be your motivation. I believe that you can go back onstage and continue with him as your inspiration. He'd want you to be happy, you know?"

Christian mustered up a smile. He couldn't believe that he was getting advice from such a smart child. "Thank you, Jake. Thank you so much."

-

The birthday man couldn't help but go back into autopilot like he did in Act 1, still devastated that he couldn't spend his special day with his lover. Even just one hour with him would be enough. Just as long as he could hold him in his arms for a while and remind him how madly in love he was. Because he was. My god, was Christian in love with Andrew.

He continued to hope that wherever Andy was, he was okay, though he wasn't sure if anyone could notice how worried he was on the inside as he said his countless lines onstage.

The show came to an end and it seemed like a relief to finally be able to take a bow after another exhausting show and day. I need a drink... or two, he thought, ready to change into his regular clothes before he heard another knock on the door. He paused for a bit before saying, "Come in!"

The door opened slightly and Jake's head popped in. "Hey again, Christian. Great job tonight, as always!"

"Thank you, Jake. You too. You're such a talented young man."

"You're so nice."

"No, you are! You cheered me up tonight and I'm thankful."

"You can thank me by greeting this guest of mine with a kiss or something."

Jake pushed the door wide open to reveal an enormously smiling Andrew Rannells, arms open wide for a hug. Jake moved out of the way as Christian ran into his fiance's arms, squeezing him with all his might as he forced himself not to cry.

It was such a touching moment to watch. Andrew smiled at Jake who looked at the couple in awe, and the man sighed happily as he smelled Christian's lovely perfume which missed smelling everyday so dearly. It felt like forever since they'd last seen each other, and the fact that they were together once again just put all the emotions back in one place.

"I'm sorry I haven't called you in a while, baby. I wanted to surprise you with a week off and that took a lot of arrangements."

Christian ignored the explanation and moved to repeatedly peck Andrew's lips, the latter having to shield Jake's eyes due to Christian's display of affection. Jake laughed and waved the two goodbye, leaving them alone in their moment of reunion.

"Jake told me that he noticed your sadness a week ago and immediately contacted me with the help of the Ryan Sell and Ryan Foust. Those three kids are literally such a sweet group for helping me arrange my plans to come here. They even gave me ideas for your birthday surprise."

"There's more? God, I'm just happy that you're here, babe. I love you so much."

Andrew pressed a kiss on Christian's forehead. "I love you too. Happy birthday."