Maybe this isn't as fake as we think(Birdflash)

It's not like I don't want to...

Dick was ashamed and guilty and oh so hopeful.

    He was pretty sure he'd never looked forward to a mission more.

    Dick had been harboring a crush on Wally since... he wasn't even sure. It had happened so slowly and then on a mission about two years ago Wally had been KO'd and Robin had feared the worst. It had to have been less than ten minutes that Dick had feared Wally was dead, but it had been enough to show him that he couldn't live without Wally. He'd known his feelings were deep, but that's when he'd realized they weren't platonic.

    So yeah. Dick was hopeful. He was hopeful that Wally would accept the mission and that he'd get to... well, not hold back for a week. If he wanted to take Wally's hand, he'd be able to. He'd get to smile lovingly at his... friend... and brush his fiery hair out of his face and maybe even kiss him. For like, two weeks.

    Naturally the down side to that was once the mission ended they'd have to go back to being just friends again but Dick could handle that. He knew he could. He just wanted to have Wally once. Just to feel what it was like. Then he could go back to pretending he wasn't hopelessly in love with his best friend. Dick just needed to feel that once, and he could die a happy man. Which, in his profession, would probably happen sooner rather than later.

    And all of that was why he felt ashamed and guilty.

    He had to be the most selfish person on this planet to be having these thoughts. It was a mission! If Wally accepted it was only because he was doing his job. He didn't even like boys. All of these thoughts and images in Dick's head were betrayals to his friend. This whole thing felt like Dick taking advantage of Wally.

    So, Dick's guilt successfully trampled his hope and he wasn't looking forward to seeing Wally half as much as he usually did.