The Undead

Muddy Waters.

You know you'll be fine when your not alone.-an

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The morning arose like every other. Breakfast was served, fresh fruit and water. Erik changed into her usual attire, light blue, cropped ripped jeans, a rustic brown singlet and a plaid red and light grey jacket tied tight around her waist. Quite honestly she looked like hell, the dark circled eyes, and bags. She was guilty and nervous about telling Phin about it if she was pregnant.

The worldly era was no place for a baby to grow.
They're the first lesson to kill and hold a gun/knife at the  age of 5-8y/o
All the food they could eat was fruit and spam with the sider of venison. The contemplation was giving Erik a headache as it was.

Now sitting content, everyone was gathered in the group. Stephanie, Erik, Phin, Jazzmin, and of course Caitlin. Rick, Hershel and the rest had done their chores, assessed what needed to be and were now doing things elsewhere.  

Phin was first to break the silence.

"What I said last night, stands." Stephanie just looked at Erik and raised an eyebrow, "If that's how you feel, leave. But I won't have this group put through hell again." Erik stood up in defense, "Hold the fuck up- Leaving- no one is leaving." Everyone looked at Erik, "We all know sometime, someday they'll be a herd. There is no doubt about it, I can't let them get to you an-" Pausing a tension raised, "Wait am I missing something." Jazzmin asked, "No it is fine." Erik replied shooting daggers in confusion and angry towards Phin.  "We're putting up reinforces though." Caitlin purposed, "It'll take awhile, Lorrie said it'll take at least a couple of weeks to get use to but what can we do." "This is a democracy, Phin. Raise your hand if you're staying." And everyone including Stephanie raised their hand, all expect Phin who awkwardly sat there in defeat. "Dismissed." Everyone left expect Erik.

Erik's POV|

"Dismissed." Stephanie declared, and I felt angry and confused. "Can you stay back for a minute Phin?" I asked he did do so. "Yes?" I felt nervous, now was the time to tell him, if he knew or not. Anxiety filled the space between us. "Why do you wanna leave?".  I looked for a glimpse of reaction from him but received nothing but confusion. "Like I said, it's not always going to safe." 

It felt like there was more for him to say, but there was no pressure. "After you said, and I quote- I can't let them get you and. What did you mean by, and?" He too by my question looked nervous and he opened his mouth gaped he then closed it. "Nothing. I just get worried about you." I nodded, lying. "Okay, I need to go talk to Hershel-" Phin turned his back and nodded waving, "Oh and Phin don't worry about me, I'm fine." I could feel a sense of him pout. I stood up from the hay bail I sat on and walk inside towards his room where I sat on his bed.

Hershel looked up at me startled, "Hello, dear." I smiled at him, "Hersh I promised the guys after we went hunting I'd get checked out. Would you mind?" "Not at all, although I'd need to know why." I looked at him saying nothing but walking in away from the door frame. "Well-" excluding the fact I might be pregnant, "-I get a lot of frequent pains, sometimes in my abdomen and hips." He stood up from his spot, "Can you raise your shirt. I just need to hear your heartbeat". I raised my shirt as asked without a problem and he got his stepiscope and assessed my beat. "Breathe in-" inhale "And out-" exhale. This time from between my shoulder blades he moved the scope to my lower back, it felt icy cold. "Again." inhale, exhale. "Once more." inhale, exhale. "You seem fine, it might be bruising? Can I feel?" I nodded.

He pressed a little pressure, "Tell me when it hurts." The hips were okay, a bit of wincing. He pressed lightly ontop my stomach and it hurts a bit. "Its mostly bruising on the bones on your hips, you are a bit too skinny so it could be nutrition. How have you been feeling." "Faint, most times when I stand I feel fine but then I feel dizzy. In the night I usually don't sleep. I get sick  every morning, I get turned off around meat and I am always hungry for peaches." He sighs, clearly he knew what was wrong, "Correct me if I am false or excuse me if I am too straightforward but did you have sexual intercourse with someone over the past few days?"

.shit. 

I nodded in red embarrassment, "Shane." I quietly muttered but he heard it. "How long have you known?" "Not long. about 2-4days, give or take." "And you went hunting." By this point, he seemed upset and confused. I nodded. "What if you had got bitten or hurt?" "What if I don't want it, huh?" And now I was shouting, "You don't know what I want, how I feel Hershel." 

Rick and Glenn rushed in, "What happened. We heard shouting." "Nothing, I was just leaving." I heard Hershel and a Glenn call out my name, as I walked down the stairs and down the gravel road ready to wail out. I could hear Shane run after me but I outran him.

About a mile away, in a field of dead sweet corn and wheat.  I kneeled in the wheat, not crying but contemplating.

I couldn't have this baby, not like this, I'm too young. 
I wouldn't be able to provide, the worry. I can't even look after myself.

Staring at the trees in front of me.

No one will look at me the same.
Everyone will think I am disgusting, hell I think I am.

"Slut." I called myself, "No not really-" I didn't hear Phin between me, as he sat in front of me.
"No, I don't think you are." "I am." And now he'll probably know because Hershel told them. "This baby is your choice." He said, "Hershel ay'." he shook his head, "Glenn." He nodded, "How long." "Just after you came back." I sighed

"I can't do this, Phin. Not anymore." I sigh in defeat as he pulled me in, embracing me in a comforting hug.  The smell of mint and pine lingering on his dirty white v-neck.  "It isn't just you anymore, it's us."