The Undead

Hating Goodbyes.

I felt the cold kiss my face, I could hear some male voice lurk and echo in my mind calling my name it sounded so weak and sad. "We're leaving tomorrow me, Daryl and Rick also Glenn. I promise we won't be gone too long." I felt them kissed my forehead it was so sweet and warm, I kept my eyes closed. "I know Shane will look after you, he's a good man. I know he's got a temper and sometimes is an asshole but he's strong inside." Caressing my head he continued, "I am sorry-" His voice deepening, "I'm sorry I really didn't come to see you, I am sorry I've been busy. It's not really an excuse but I promise I will bring you something back. Something pretty to much your green eyes and the bright beautiful smile, I wish you to have, I wish you'd smile."

I just wanted to hug him, tell him I love him to be safe and do not go far. I want to tell him it's okay, it's not his fault if I only could muster the strength and energy, but it's wasted on sulking and being bitter.

"I'll let you sleep now." He stood up and reached for the doorknob, I didn't want him to leave, "Don't leave me here." I whispered just in time for me to hear. 

He came back to my bedside and kneeled, "Lie next to me, just until I fall asleep. I am scared to be alone." He stood up nodding, I shimmed over to the other side and Phin laid down. His head laying down on the cream-colored pillow, staring at me, with half a smile. "Don't blame yourself Phin, you try. I can see you. Be safe. I love you." He leaned his forehead on mine and kissed it like a final goodbye. "I don't like goodbyes." "Then I'll see you later." I smiled at his response and fell into a motionless sleep, dreaming of my perfect world once again.

I knew he'd left that night, and I heard the engine turn on at dawn. It woke me up, in which I stood at the window watching them stand their packing up their gears and climbing in. Til Phin was the last, he looked up at my window and saw me standing there ever so cold and pale. He just smiled and climbed into the back of the pickup truck. Rick turned the ignition, I really hoped he wouldn't leave, never the less he stared at me smiling until the truck was no longer in sight.

I stood there for a few more minutes thinking, I thought of last night and the farewell kissed placed on my head, the warming embrace as he hugged me goodnight and left the room. Like he only existed for this.

"He'll be back, there is no killing that kid, strong as titanium. Don't worry, he'll be okay." Shanes' voice made me flinch from behind, "But it's impossible for me not to worry, Shane I may be the youngest but I still worry the most." Shane walked up behind me wrapping a blanket around me, "You must be cold, here-" And as the sun rose above the horizon the smile faded from my lips but Phin's touch still existed and kept me warm. I pray for him and everyone else returns, his safety and health as well as the others.

And I know there is no god, because then why would he let his children suffer and die a painful death. To walk among the living undead like a zombie. But sometimes what can you do when there isn't anything to do but sit, and wait.