Smile Like You Mean It (One)

Chapter Thirty

"I-I can't do this anymore." Bryony choked out. "When I look at you...I don't see the boy that I fell in love with all those months ago...I see a liar, I-I feel...nothing."

Sal took a seat on the bed, bringing his knee to rest up on the mattress, as he turned to face Bryony. A deep sigh escaped him, as he looked her up and down. He could feel his own heart crumble in his chest, as he swallowed her words, letting them ricochet through him.

"Y-You don't love me?" His voice shaken, as Bryony took a seat on the bed, shaking her head sheepishly.

"I love you, Sal...but this...thing, I guess, between us is toxic." She let her hand rest between them, as Sal hesitantly moved his to sit atop of hers. His palm held onto her tightly, as their eyes met, each filled to the brim with tears. "I think it's better if we just remain friends...for the sake of the baby."

Sal nodded his head, his eyes screwing shut, as he fought to hold back the tears, but to no avail. He broke down in front of her, showing Bryony the weak and vulnerable side of him. His heartbreak was contagious, as Bryony, too, started to cry. His grip around her hand tightened, as his whole body trembled.

The pair of them sat for a short while, letting the split between them settle, before Sal wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his hoodie. He sniffled lightly, his eyes bloodshot and swollen, looking across at Bryony.

"What happens now?" He asked, as Bryony met with his stare, before averting her gaze down to the floor. She shrugged her shoulders, shaking her head, as she struggled to answer his question. "Do you want me to move out?"

"No!" Bryony was quick to answer. "No...please stay."

"Where do you want me to sleep then?"

"In here..." She answered quietly, as Sal looked at her, a confused expression across his face. He rose an eyebrow, tilting his head, as he tried to understand her.

"So you want me to stay in the bed...even though you don't love me? How does...why would that...I'm confused." He let an awkward chuckle pass his lips, as Bryony squeezed his hand.

"Just because I don't see you in that way anymore doesn't mean that I want you to miss out on bonding with the baby. You're his father, and he needs to know your voice, Sal." She expressed.

Sal nodded his head, letting a small smile lay on his lips. He cleared his throat, looking around the room, before he let his gaze fall onto Bryony. He could feel his breath quicken, his heart beating in his chest, as he swallowed back his feelings for her. Sal couldn't resist himself, as he leant in, placing a soft kiss to her lips, catching Bryony off-guard. She pulled back, breaking the caress of his lips, witnessing his face fall.

"Sal, please don't make this any harder than it already is."

"I couldn't help it," He sighed. "I lov-"

"Please don't say that word." She choked out, causing Sal's voice to trail off, as he slowly closed his mouth, nodding his head.

"Just friends...right." Sal faked a smile, as he stood from the bed, pointing to the doorway to the living room. "I'm going to go and give you some time to yourself...I'll try not to disturb you when I come to bed."

"Sal, it's almost one in the morning...you never stay up late." Bryony responded, looking at him sincerely. "Are you trying to avoid me?"

"No...no, of course not...I just-I thought that you'd need peace and quiet to get to sleep." He stated, watching, as Bryony patted the spot on the mattress next to her, gesturing for Sal to take a seat once again.

He nodded, stepping his way back over to the bed, as he took a seat, turning to face Bryony. She offered him a small smile, seeing the hidden sadness in the emerald orbs staring back at her. Deep down inside she felt bad, almost regretting the decision, but she knew that it was better for the baby. It wasn't so much that she didn't love him anymore, but more so that the constant arguing was getting to her, and she didn't want it to happen all of the time when their son were to arrive into the world. With her and Sal breaking up, it meant that they could still be there for the baby, without the added stress of trying to fix all of the holes in their relationship. It was just best to do what was right for the baby, in her mind anyway.

"I still care for you. I'm not mad at you, but we clearly don't work well as a couple...think about it, when did we last have a night just you and I?" She asked, as Sal listened intently.

"Was it because I worked too much?"

"No, Sal. There were nights where we were both free, and still didn't do anything. We lost the spark, so what's the point in continuing when all we do is argue?"

"I'm sorry." He frowned, as Bryony shook her head, sniffing, as a small heartfelt laugh escaped her.

"Don't be sorry, it's just not meant to be. You hear that? No one is blaming you, okay?" She smiled, nudging her elbow into his side, as Sal blushed, nodding his head.

"Okay." He answered, all of the anger, sadness, and heartache fading, seeing that himself and Bryony were better off as just friends. He still cared for her, but in a different sense now. For the better.

Sal wrapped his arms around Bryony, pulling her into a warming embrace, placing a kiss to her head, before reluctantly breaking away from her. "Goodnight then."

"Goodnight, Sal."

The pair of them clambered under the covers, with their backs to each other. A silence swamped the room, before Bryony heard a deep sigh come from behind her. She rolled over, as Sal felt the mattress dip. He peered over his shoulder, seeing how Bryony was now facing him. "Are you okay?"

"Just can't sleep..." Sal answered quietly, rolling over to face her properly. "It's just been so long since I've had to fall asleep without cuddling you."

His words stung her unknowingly, as she let a small smile pull at her lips. Bryony rolled back over, moving her hand back to grab hold of Sal's, as she let his arm drape over her waist. Sal scooted along the bed to get himself closer, as he held her tightly, the feelings of having the girl in his arms coming running back to him. He ran his palm over her baby bump, feeling a little kick come from the baby, causing them both to chuckle.

"Better?" She asked him, feeling Sal nod his head against her back.

"Much better."