Fear Of Intimacy

My Baby Brother, Liam

Liam ^^

*Rowen's POV*

Stupid ass nurse. I couldn't hold back clenching my jaw when I saw Gen jump. I softly sigh because I can feel myself already getting attached to her. It's not a bad thing to get attached but after jumping around from state, you kinda give up on the thoughts of relationships of any kind.

       I can't blame that on anyone but me though, I was the one who wanted to get away from everything. I didn't fit into the Jenkins name. Only took them 4 years to finally find me. That makes it sound like I wanted them to. Maybe a part of me wanted them to care. Or at least put up and effort to locate me. You're the black sheep Rowan. That and you look like your cheating father.

I usually try not to think about my father, but I really try to not think about most of my life. That doesn't ever work though. When I look in the mirror all I can see is him, and all my birthdays he ruined, all the Christmas's left with screaming and crying. He ruined our lives, but I didn't ever want him dead.

        I sigh hard and look up to see Genevieve sipping on her water and eating crackers. I can't help but to smile at how adorable she is, even if she does try to keep up that bad girl persona. That song was even more adorable. The nurse was watching me stare at her, but honestly I could give two fucks about what anyone thinks. Probably another reason I don't fit into the Jenkins name.

I feel so terrible about making Gen cry, but I don't think it was all over me asking. I can't stop thinking about the baby she brought to daycare though. What if it's hers? My eyes widen, what if she has a boyfriend? I look away before our eyes have a chance to meet. She probably just sees me as a friend. I'm so stupid. Why does it even matter to me? We just met 20 mins ago.
         

After she gets done, I walk her back to the gym, making sure to give the nurse a dirty look on my way out. I can feel Gen's eyes on me but try not to give into the temptation of looking back.

I'm still completely hung up on the fact that maybe she has a boyfriend, or even a girlfriend. Fuck, what if she's not even gay? Does anyone else know about her kid? I stayed silent the whole walk back and once we got into the gym the bell rings.

   While picking up my bag, I see a girl coming towards me and I can already hear her smacking her gum. I innerly cringe and sighed when she walked up.

        "Hey Hot stuff" I pulled away when she tried to massage my arm. "Do I know you?". Don't get me wrong, the girl was pretty, but she was cringy. And definitely not my type.

Whatever her name was then got closer to me and whispered in my ear "You'll want to sweetheart". I sighed and realized that I hadn't had sex in three months, but I wasn't about to give it up for everyone's sloppy seconds.

Just then I feel her grab my ass and give me what I'm assuming she thought was a sexy smile. Grabbing her arm tightly, I push her off and fake smile, and make up some excuse like I'm sick and walk towards the gym door.

I glance back to see Gen in the girls face, and I softly smile. No Rowan. Boyfriend, baby, get a hold of yourself. Silently sighing I walk to my next class.

      I can't wait to get out of school, but at least I'm in my last class of the day. I really need to go shopping. But I also have to pick up Haley after school.

I'm so thankful I have Haley. She's my best friend and roommate. Without her I don't know what I would do. She's like my actual mom, even though she's only 25. Damn that's really not that old, but my 18 year old self has to make fun of her. I just don't know how she could run that daycare. Kids are not my strong suit.

        I wonder how Genevieve handles her baby. Her baby looks kinda old, but Gens only a junior or maybe she failed a grade or two. Sighing again I remember how I found out more about her. And the dirty look my sister threw at me when she heard the answers her friend gave me.

Okay Ro, you're obsessing over a girl you don't even know. You wanna know her though. You wanna know every single think about her. I shake my head and try to focus on the lesson but I only have 5 mins left.

      After packing up, the bell rang and I headed out to my bike trying to avoid both Gen and the slut from the gym. I head over to the daycare in hopes Haley is ready to go. Only to have to wait till everyone is picked up and the building is clean. I hear Haley talking to me but I'm too caught up watching for Gen's car.

        I get up after Haley basically screams my name. I help her clean up and hear a car stop and cut off outside. My heart begins to pound so hard I feel like everyone around me can hear it. I try not to stare at the door when I hear light footsteps in the building.

"Rowan?" Oh god I love the way she says my name. Looking up, I see her softly biting her lip and I can't do anything but melt.

"Hey Genevieve" is what I squeak out which of course made her giggle.

"I want you to meet someone" oh god, oh my god, she wants me to meet her baby. I think I nodded because we started walking over to this little boy and I watched her pick him up and I start to think about how it could actual be a good thing if she was a mother.

She's beautiful, obviously smart, and I want to get to know her. So what if she had a baby? That doesn't change anything. And I avoided her all day. Fucking great Rowan.

"Rowan id like you to meet my baby brother, Liam"