sleepless nights thoughts

something is watching

Okay, so in our household there are three, sometimes four, people, and six animals. One chaweenie, Bama, one Chihuahua, Ruby, then Ruby and Bama's son, Bear,  and Zues, another Chihuahua. While their barking at everthing out the window gets on my nerves, they are not the ones I have to worry about. No see out other two members are my aloof cat, Doofus, and the latest addition, Doofus's son, Lucifer, whom we call Luci.

Doofus has been with us for two years and much as I love him, he ignores me! He hates me, or this is how I used to feel, but since we brought Luci home Doofus has changed. He comes home more, and even wants us to pet him. We are no longer just the beings that provide him with food. This makes me happy.

Unfortunatly, Luci loves us too much I believe. It started off small, the usual kitten stuff, then it started to get weird. The first weird thing we noticed is that Bear appears to be the kittens subordinate. Well we found out why one night, the cat is giving him.....sexual favors! I know, who is going to believe that, but it's true, Toria wittnessed it first, even got it on video. Then one night Iam woken up by this sucking noise in my eat, it's Luci! sucking on my ear! WTF! Yeah i know it's just suckling, but jeeze, sonce that time it has been done multiple times every night, always when I am on the verge of sleep. Think iy's trying to keep me from sleeping.

Then i started having other problems, so I talked to Toria and she has had similar problems. The cat is trying to kll us. It's true, and I'll explain it all, so be patient. I imagina the cat is thinking along these lines...."Ha ha ha, stupid humans, you think I am just rubbing on you bein all cute, but in teality I am looking for your weaknesses...." then insert an evil laugh here....." I know when you have to sleep, so I will get you used to the fact that I sleep close to your face while I am still tiny. Then, before you know it I will be a twenty pound fluffy weight on your face that you will not be able to remove. And with all my fluffy hair your breathing will cease!"....insert another evil laugh....Oh crap the cat is looking over my shoulder at what I am writing! He knows I know his plan....listen if you hear of a death in alabama of a woman who seemed to have been smothered by her cat, remember to bot let him get away with it....this is for you Toria, avenge your mama, do you understand, who else is going to help you take over the world?

Oh wait it went to sleep I don't think he realized what I was writing, yet! It may only be a matter of time. I did try to talk to Luci, to find  out if he was really trying to kill me, but being a cat, he ignored me completly. I mean you know how cats are, right? The funny thing is, his father, Doofus, is the one who has the evil looking face. Seriously, he NEVER looks happy, and he only purs like once every few months. On the other hand Luci has learned how to get past our defenses by actong cute, playful, and lovey-dovey. He even has my husband wrapped around his tail! And this is a big deal cause he HATES cats. 

Hmmmm, I wonder, it was Scott who suggested we bring Luci home, and he plays with him all the time, even though he has a severe allergy to cats. When did Luci get to him? It must have been when he visited next door, that is where the mama cat lives. Scott goes there everyday to visit our older neighbors.

Now I know what you are thinking, what a paranoid person, but when the time comes, I will prove zi am right.  At.leastone person, so far, believes me. So all I have to do is watch my back, from Luci, and gayher my evidence. It's only a matter of time before I have it all together, or am smothered in my sleep. Wonder which will come first. I will win this war! Don't het me wrong though, I love ALL my animals, so I am hoping to get the dogs to help me out and turn the cat away from the dark path he has chosen.  I mean, just because I named him Lucifer does not mean he has to act like Lucifer! Or maybe I named him that because I knew the day would came when we would have to face off against each other in a life and death battle! Don't worry, I will keep everyone informed of the process we both make in this war of cat versus human!