At bottom and aloft

Chapter Three

Dear diary,
I got a new haircut, just like I promised. And also dye my hair, they aren't dirty blonde but fawn brown now. I feel actually pretty good. I also cleaned out my closet and got rid of things I don't like and went to the shops for new ones. Everything I need to do now is lose extra weight. That won't be too hard. I'll think positive, eat less and workout harder. Let's do it together!

    Today was our every Wednesday family dinner. Mom set up that we should eat at least once a week dinner together so we could talk about...well...everything we needed to talk about.
,,Are you okay sweetie?" Asked me my mom
,,Why wouldn't I be?"
,,You didn't even touch your meal."
,,Yeah, I'm just not hungry much. I'm fine."
,,Okay, well you don't have to eat it if you don't feel like it." And so I smiled and came back to my room. I stand in front of the mirror in my room. I rolled up my T-shirt as always and looked at my belly. I haven't eaten in three days. I guess I can see a little difference, I'll just keep going this way for a few days and I'll be fine.

    Next day when I got up I decided to wear something that I haven't worn for a while. And that was exactly those shammy dark blue dress. They were tight all over my body as always. But not too much. So I came to school with Crystal like every morning. I came into class where we had math. I hailed Cany and she looked up to look at me.
,,I remember those dress! They were tighter than that, weren't they?" I felt worm feeling around my heart. That was so nice too hear.
,,Yeah, I think so. Thank you."
She noded and came back to work. Neila, my neighbor at math class kept looking at me.
,,You really got thinner." She said and I smiled and shrugged.

    After a few classes came Olivia to my desk and told me:
,,You look really beautiful in those dresses."
I got a feeling that I heard that sentence too much today. It started getting suspicious.
,,Thank you Olivia. You don't look bad yourself." She NEVER looked bad herself. She looked always cute and beautiful. I bet she knew it even through her disagreements.
,,Well, I don't know..., anyway have you heard that we're going to that theatre in centre?"
,,No! I absolutely haven't heard about that."
,,Well teacher told us when we had English lesson and you've had French so..."
,,That's fantastic! You know what are we going to watch there?"
,,I guess it would be Shakespeare again because like we all know Mrs. Groow is obsessed with this guy."
,,Yeah, we ALL know that."
Silent occurred between us. Weird silence. Olivia was looking away and that made all things even weirder.
,,Olivia..."
,,Yes!" She revived and put on her innocent smile
,,What's wrong?"
,,Nothing."
,,Olivia! Tell me."
,,Okay, well. You know that you haven't been there previous day."
,,Of course I know that."
,,Okay...Vincent was asking for you."
,,Vincent....was asking...for me?"
,,Yeah, exactly my reaction. He told me that he has something for you."
,,I think I have an idea what are you talking about."
,,What?"
,,Where is he now? I want to have it done."
,,I think he has biology."
,,Okay, see ya!"
I caught up with him on the stairs.
,,Olivia said that you've got something for me."
,,I found that underneath my bed. And well...I figured it belonged to you."
,,I've been searching for it everywhere!"
,,Well hear you go."
,,Thanks."
,,Look, Becca...I'm really..."
,,I have to run. Thanks again."
,,Wait!..."

    I came back home and I felt little tired. My head was spinning and I felt little sick. I lay down and fell asleep in a few minutes. And in a minute I heard glass shattering. Or...in four hours. I ran out of my room and headed to kitchen. My mom was there.
,,Sorry, I throw off that vase accidentally. I didn't mean to wake you."
,,That's okay."
,,Aren't you feeling sick? You look a little pale."
,,I'm just tired."
,,Have you eaten something? I haven't seen you eat something at home for past four days."
,,I always grab something when you're gone."
,,Okay then take a rest. If it gets worse we'll go see a doctor okay?"
I just noded and came back to my room. I came in front of my mirror and look at my reflexion. I stand there in underwear and I was watching my body then I pulled out of the box underneath my bed a journal. My journal.

Dear diary,
It's been four days since I grabbed something to eat. I won't lie I feel a little hungry, actually a lot. But I can see my body changing. I'm starting to losing weight. I read on the internet that are existing some appetite suppressants that you can buy in a most of regular markets. I'm gonna make it. Just a few days and I'm gonna be beautiful.