Hey all! So the girl in this chapter is supposed to be me :) I want a Jeep Wrangler and I'm newly licensed lol Oh, and August 13th is my birthday
Enjoy!
(Drew's POV)
August 13th
I shut down my laptop and closed the cover. I had just finished an english paper on The Time Traveler's Wife. In a way, it reminded me of my parents. My father had spent his life trying to fit in, jumping in and out of the new decades looking for that special girl. And then he had finally found her- in the age where he stuck out the most. Together they fought to overcome his differences and to understand each other when the world thought they couldn't. They fought and they made up. And in the end- they promised to find each other no matter where the other went.
My mom couldn't have had it easy, but she was in love and never regretted a single thing; I guess that's what she gets for being The Vampire's Wife.
I was better now. I could think about them without having the suicidal, guilt ridden thoughts I usually did, it was nice that way; To think about them.
Gabriel's journals helped a lot. I liked knowing about him, the real him, it made me feel closer to him and also made me realize how unperfect he was- and that my faults only made me the human he wanted to be. Nobody was perfect- and now I could actually believe that.
I pushed my chair back from my desk and walked down the hall to the bathroom. I locked the door and slumped against it to the floor. So many thoughts raced through my mind that it didn't matter what I did- my mind was never at rest. I stood up and splashed cold water on my face and neck and then stared at myself in the mirror for the longest time. I didn't know the boy staring back. He was more strange to me than an alien.
I finally felt the weight in my front pocket. It really didn't weigh much, but to me it could have been the weight of the world. I slipped the cool silver from my pocket and held it in front of my eyes. It reflected the light off its edges and showed me the broken, worthless boy holding it. I touched my finger to its corner, a bead of red popped out from my skin. I skimmed the silver piece across my wrist. It tickled my flesh and sent goosebumps up my arms. I got lost in this sick, twisted, fantasy that the knock at the door actually scared me. My heart lept into my throat.
"Drew, are you in there?"
It was my sister.
"Y-yes?"
"We're heading out now, okay? Just a quick dinner and possibly ice cream. We'll be right back!"
Rhoan was taking my sister out to celebrate her graduating highschool, and to celebrate her 18th birthday- in the haste and jumble of our lives, July 22nd had come and gone unnoticed and unwanted.
"Fine. Take your time," I mumbled.
"Are you sure you don't want to come?"
My blood dripped onto the white porcelain sink.
"I'm sure."
I could hear her walking away, but then I was compelled to say something. So I opened the door halfway, making sure that my right arm was hidden behind the door.
"Nikola," I say, she turns and her bright green eyes hold mine, "by the way, happy birthday."
Drip. Drip. Drip. Every drop of blood on the bathroom floor sounds like a bomb in my ears.
She smiles back, "Thanks, little brother."
I watch her walk down the stairs and then wait until I hear the front door close. I keep still until I can't hear the thrum of Rhoan's car. And then, I let the door creak open fully. I just stand there, blood dripping down my arm, razor in hand, looking into nothing as if I was looking into my sister's eyes- looking like I was trying to say 'hey, this is me. You're looking but you aren't really seeing.'
My muscles relax and the razor clangs as it hits the floor. I walk back down the hall and into my room. And as I stuffed a few shirts into a backpack, I only thought how much a door could conceal. It made my sister think I was okay. It could hide a murder scene from an untrained eye. It could hide the horror of seeing the abused in domestic violences. And it was only wood...
I walked down the stairs for the last time and swiped my car keys from the table by the door. I took in the smells, the sights, one last time...and then I walked out of my house forever.
My porsche sped surprisingly quiet over the dirt roads.
On my way out of town, I saw a girl on the sidewalk. She was jumping for joy as her parents held out a car key and she saw a Jeep Wrangler with a big red bow on it. The girl had blonde hair and big brown eyes. She was a new driver, fresh and newly licensed. The scene was so normal- it gave me some hope for the rest of the world, but also a sense of disappointment. How could there be people out there jumping over a new car when there were others, like me, already driving a car but hoping they would get into a hazardous accident, or wanting it to all be over? We didn't want to be happy over a new car, or a first time drive, we didn't want to be walking down the street with a girl on our arm, we didn't want to smile or to laugh. In my opinion, we were just walking time bombs- waiting to explode.
I was running away and I was never coming back...
Well, you know what they say- 'Like father, like son'.
-Drew
