No Homo

Chapter 1 - Home

*Marture-ish Content Warning

"You want to throw a housewarming party?" Minho questioned his friend incredulously, staring at him as if he'd just grown a second head as he set down the box of dishware he'd been carrying forever and wiped an unfortunate sleeve against his sweaty forehead.

He and his best friend, Thomas, were both fucking broke, like, broke as hell, broke but this was nothing unexpected for kids their age. They were two unemployed teenagers trying to make their way through college on runner's scholarships alone and student loans sure as hell weren't cheap. After Minho's parents had finally given him the boot, moving in together and splitting the rent had simply been the most economically sound solution for both of them and it was nothing uncomfortable since they stayed the night with each other most of the time anyway. Just two bros who were way behind on their mortgage finding a cheaper way to live. But a house warming party...

"Sure, people give you free stuff at those, right?" Thomas explained excitedly, popping the cap off a water bottle and bringing the container to his lips, downing half the liquid inside before wiping his mouth on his sleeve and handing the drink to Minho.

"I don't know...," The Korean boy replied hesitantly, taking the bottle from his friend and making quick work of the rest of the water before tossing the empty bottle aside to be worried about later. "It might seem a little gay." He finally admitted, scratching the back of his head awkwardly as Thomas leaned back on his heels and began humming softly in thought as he mulled over his friend's concern. Suddenly the brunette snapped his fingers, grinning like an idiot as Minho waited patiently to hear his solution, silently hoping his friend had actually figured out a way to win them free gifts without looking like a couple of queers.

"What if...," Thomas began, spreading out his hands and pausing mid-sentence for dramatic effect. "We say no homo." He finally concluded, giving Minho a questioning look, one eyebrow quirked and a smug smile pulling at his lips, as if he'd just said the most ingenious statement ever uttered by man. Minho stared at him blankly for a moment, running the suggestion over in his own mind, checking it for flaws and finding none, before slowly beginning to nod his head along to the idea.

"That could work." The boy finally declared, sounding genuinely impressed with his friend's intelligence as Thomas let out a victorious whoop and pumped his fist into the air before falling into an off-key jingle of "We're gonna get free stuff! We're gonna get free stuff!"

That was how the boy found himself in his current predicament, groaning in pure agony as Newt asked the same question he'd been forced to endure time and time again all fucking day.

"So, you and Tommy finally decided to unlock the bloody closet door?" The Brit inquired cheerily, holding out a large, poorly wrapped parcel for the irritated boy to take and wearing a smirk that made Minho want to punch him in the face. The bright blue paper was coming untaped from a smushed cardboard box underneath and a bright pink makeshift bow was sliding steadily sideways off the top.

"No!" Minho snapped a little too quickly, snatching the present away from the kid, ripping the already tarnished paper slightly in the process as, from somewhere across the room, a simultaneous protest was practically screamed by Thomas. The teen released Newt from his pointed stare, tearing his dark eyes away from the blond to where his housemate was currently glaring daggers into his sister, Teresa. However, the pale girl was too busy leaning on some chick with short cropped, brown hair that Minho didn't recognize to keep from collapsing into a heap as laughter stole her breath away to even notice.

The brunette dropped his head into his hands in defeat, running his fingers exasperatedly through short, untamed hair before letting out a dreadful groan loud enough for Minho to hear across the small room. The boy quickly took it as an excuse to free himself from the awkward conversation Newt had him locked in and made his escape, nodding over at a miserable looking Thomas as an explanation and practically darting away as the blond waved him off with a knowing smirk and a small, victorious laugh.