young and stupid [sequel to bad boy next door]

Chapter Fifteen

~Sierra Sparks~

Thunder. Lightning. It is one of those nights. Another night where I wouldn’t sleep. Not without him. It’s been five nights of this. And it’s even summer. I guess my mood is the weather.

I get out of bed, and slide on hoodie. I can’t take this. I can’t do it. I need him. Like usual. I miss him. I’m going after him.

I head to my window, sliding it up and climbing out in a quick pace. He doesn’t live that far. He’s basically right next door. He’s my neighbor. I would never escape him and I can’t fight how I feel.

For god sakes, he got anger management classes for me. That boy is perfect and I wouldn’t let him go. Yet he lied.

It still rings in my head. He lied to me all along. But it was to protect me. From what? Who knows… And but… I pray… It wasn’t him who murdered Tommy. I’m praying that maybe I am wrong. I hope I am.

My feet touch the ground and I’m off in a run. It’s a full out sprint I couldn’t do this anymore. I need him.

I go straight to Austin’s front door, knocking on it softly. I’m shivering hard as I stand in front of the door. I clutch onto myself to try and warm myself up but it isn’t working. I see a light flicker on and soon the door opens.

It opens to reveal Ms. Mahone, and her eyes widen when she sees it’s me. I know Austin tells her everything so I know she knows.

“Sierra! Oh my god. Dear, come in. Shit. Austin Carter Mahone! Wake up!” She shouts as she helps me in. She shuts the door immediately and sits me down on the beach near the door. I’m shivering completely as I sit there probably looking so stupid.

“Are you crazy?” She whispers as she looks at my shivering self.

“For your son… yeah,” I admit as I stare up at her with sad eyes.

“AUSTIN CARTER MAHONE!” She immediately yells and it’s even louder this time. This time I hear running footsteps as if he thinks this is some emergency. I’m still shivering. Jesus. It’s cold. Really cold.

I look over with sad eyes to see Austin. And just seeing him makes me cry. I really missed him. His eyes widen as he stares at me for a few seconds before rushing straight to me. He sits down on the bench quickly and pulls my tiny body onto his lap. I bury my head into his bare chest and just cry. I let it all out, because I’m upset with him yet I miss him. I probably look so stupid in all honesty. Who the hell goes back to the guy who murdered someone and lied about?

“Mom, can you start a warm shower?” I hear Austin ask in his sweet, perfect voice. I soon feel his hand rubbing against my back softly. I can barely feel it though. My body is numb from the wetness that surrounds me.

I hear his mom running straight up the stairs and then I hear doors. After that I hear Austin’s voice, “I missed you. So much.” I shut my eyes tight, stopping my silent cries and the tears that ran.

“Sierra. I didn’t do it. Okay? You have to tell me what you saw, okay? I need to fix this. I didn’t lie to you…” Austin continues as I shiver. I nod my head weakly, too scared to speak. He seems so confident as he speaks. Did he actually not do it?

I feel Austin’s arms scoop me up and pull me tight against his chest. He gets up, and then carries me up the steps. I can feel my insides twist as he carries me. I didn’t realize I missed his scent too. I missed his bed head. I missed everything.

“Are you going in with her?” I hear his mom whisper.

“Mom, she can barely move. I have to,” he responds, and she lets out a sigh. Which is true. I can barely feel my body anymore and I could feel a cold coming on.

“Fine,” she says before leaving the bathroom. Austin sets me on the counter of the sink and then closes the door. He looks directly into my sad eyes.

“I’m going to fix you, okay?” He whispers as I feel him place a warm hand to my cheek. I nod weakly, immediately feeling sleepy for some reason. I didn’t realize how tired I am.

I feel Austin slowly strip off my hoodie, and then my also soaked shirt underneath. He then slides off my pajama pants, but slowly and delicately. I don’t feel insecure either. I feel comfortable around him. Plus, I’m too tired to care.

“I’ll keep the rest on okay?” he whispers to me before sliding off my socks. I didn’t even wear shoes when I came over here. I just put on a hoodie and that did nothing.

He picks me up, helping me into the shower that was extremely hot but I didn’t mind I need it. Austin stands with me in the shower, wrapping his arms around my waist. He pulls me close to his chest, and presses a soft kiss to my forehead.

We just stand there for a good hour in silence. I’m pretty sure I feel asleep standing too. I’m exhausted.

“Sierra,” Austin whispers after a while. My eyes look up at him as he turns off the warm water. His eyes soon trail down to look at my small tiny body that stands in front of him. Just in this moment I realize I’m literally half naked and so is he. And we haven’t even actually had… sex.

“Austin… why haven’t you tried to have sex with me yet?” I just ask out of the blue. It surprises Austin as he looks down at me. I sound so tired. My voice comes out in a whisper and it’s a little rusty.

“Sierra…”

“Answer me…” I whisper, wanting to know. It’s been almost a year and he hasn’t even tried. There has only ever been one moment that was when he came to my house beaten up. And he was too weak to continue. He’s never done anything that bad while I’m like this. This moment we’re in right now is like the one who had when he came to my house cut up.

“Because I don’t see you as just some sex partner. And as soon as you have sex once, it becomes a daily thing. I’ve seen the other guys have it once and then always want it. I don’t want to do that to you. It becomes a weekly thing from what I’ve heard. I fear I’m going to keep wanting to. I don’t want to do that to you Sierra. I just can’t… I care about you too much. I want to make your first and my first the best. It has to be perfect. And I still believe you deserve more then someone like me. We’ve had our ups and downs. I want to make sure if we take it to the next level you’ll be the only one I do it with. Sounds silly, but I’m so in love with you… I can’t use you… You know that I could die any day or even you could. You’re in this now and I don’t want you to be,” Austin just admits to me as he stares down at me with his soft eyes.

“I love you,” I let out as I look up at him.

Austin’s lips curve into a small smile, “I love you too.”