Imperfections

(9)

CARL'S POV
✌✌✌✌✌✌✌✌✌✌✌

A few days had passed, and Negan finally stopped having panic attacks whenever I left his room. I was walking down the hallway to the kitchen to get something small to eat.

Negan had told me I should stay outta the cafeteria for a little while, and I agreed. I didn't wanna get stared at anyways.

Walked into the kitchen and saw a few workers. They all looked up when I stepped outta the doorframe. I gave them a small smile and walked over to the cabinets.

I opened one and saw a BigCat candy bar. My heart clenched. I shared one with Michonne not 6 months ago. I still had the python revolver Negan and I found. Its in his room on the dresser.

I took the candy bar and walked out. I power walked back to Negan's room wanting to avoid any and all people. Once I got there I opened the doors and closed them behind me.

I sat down on Negan's bed and unwrapped the candy bar. I took a bite and the taste brought back memories. Some I charished and some I wanted to forget.

I heard the door open. I turned my head to see a stressed out looking Negan standing there. "Negan.. Are you okay?" I asked gently.

He shook his head. "No baby boy I'm not." Negan mumbled just loud enough for me to hear.

I got up and wrapped my arms around his waist. He wrapped his strong arms around my shoulders. "What happened?" I asked.

Negan sighed and set his head on top of mine. "People are just asking annoying as hell questions." Negan explained.

"Like what?" I asked. Negan stayed silent. "Negan?" I pressed.

Negan sighed again. "People kept asking why I was so concerned about you.." Negan said barley loud enough to hear.

I pulled away from him, my hands still lightly resting on his waist.

"What did you say?" I asked. I wasn't sure if I really wanted the answer. I was scared of getting the shit beat out of me or Negan. We're both guys and there's an age gap. (*cough* AGE IS JUST A NUMBER *COUGH*) And on the other hand, I was scared Negan was ashamed about us.

Negan didn't answer. "Negan. What the hell did you tell them?" I demanded. "I told them it was because your like a son to me.." Negan reluctantly admitted.

I took my hands off of Negan's waist and took a step back. I saw the hurt in Negan's eyes, but forced myself not to care.

"Why did you tell them that? Are you ashamed of us?!" I questioned angrily. Negan, for the first time I've ever seen, looked at his feet. "I-i.." He trailed off.

"Are you!?" I asked even more pissed that he wasn't answering my question. Negan still stayed silent, his gaze avoiding mine at all costs.

I bit my lip and nodded. "Okay." I said. I grabbed my dirty cloths from through out the week, my gun and my hat. I stormed towards the door.

"Carl. Fuck. Please wait!" Negan called after me as I stormed down the hall and to my room. There really wasn't much of a point to it, I was only 5 does down.

I didn't really care though. I slammed my door behind me and locked it. I set all my dirty cloths in one corner of the room and my hat and gun on my dresser.

I sat down on my bed and ran my hands through my long hair. I had to stop myself from crying.

If he was ashamed of us, why was there an us?

(IK IK I HATE MYSELF TOO IM SORRY!!!!!)