The Prisoner of Azkaban & Forbidden Love

Chapter 16: Losses & Loves

It's been about a week since Sirius died, we had a small funeral for him and had him cremated. The minister of magic finally acknowledges that Voldemort is back, granted he has no choice seeing as how a lot of ministry workers saw him appear at the ministry. Also, he finally cleared Sirius's name, to bad he had to die for his name to get cleared. Thankfully the minister will be giving up his position, and hopefully it will go to someone who is not as blind.
I miss Sirius every single day, not sure how I am going to get past this but I have a beautiful baby to look forward to. I wish it were a better world to bring a baby into, but I guess things could be worse, I am not sure how, but things could always be worse.
It's August now I get to find out the sex of the baby, I hope it's a boy. If it's a boy I'll name him after Sirius and if its a girl I'll name her after Lily or perhaps Patty her and Penny were so helpful when I lived in the states. Severus has been extremely helpful with everything since Sirius died, perhaps something can happen there. I know Sirius wouldn't approve, but if he truly wants me to be happy he would understand.
Today I get to find out the sex of the baby, I am so excited, Severus asked if he could go with me I decided to let him. We get to the doctors and as she is looking around for the baby she just stops dead with a look on her face.
"What's wrong?" I demanded.
"It may be nothing, however, when is the last time you felt the baby move?"
"I feel the baby move all the time! However lately it has been less active than usual, maybe a few days."
"I am sorry to tell you this but I can't find a heartbeat and he is not moving either, he died. I am not sure how, there is not always a how or a why, I am sorry. We're going to have to do a procedure that's going to be a little bit like childbirth but we have to retrieve him or he'll cause health problems for you."
She walked away. I can't believe it the only thing of Sirius I have left is gone forever, it was a boy just like I had hoped. Severus is just sitting there staring at me.
"Thank you for coming with me Severus I don't know if I would have been able to do this on my own. This means a lot to me."
After a couple days I was able to go home, but I didn't want to go back to Grimmauld Place, and I had no place else to go. Severus offered me a place to stay until I decide what I want to do next.
Over the next couple weeks me and Severus got very close, we'd stay up all night talking, and he was the first one to make me really smile since losing Sirius and then the baby. Its almost time to go back to Hogwarts, I still haven't decided if I want to go back or not, however I have a feeling if I do its going to be a very interesting year.
Severus told me that he had a visit from Narcissa and Bellatrix while I was visiting Penny and the girls back in the states. He had to make an unbreakable vow, I don't know what it is, but coming from death eaters it can't be good and he seems very concerned.
I can't imagine what it must be like to be a double-double agrnt, but what I do know is nothing is going to happen to Severus if I can help it. I am not going to lose another person I am close to, possibly even in love with, I just can't.