Wondering

looking too closely

And I swear;
you can see how my eyes close,
how deeply I take a breath
to try not to break
to try not to crumble
in that very moment.

I swear;
you can feel
how my soul aches
how my voice cracks
when I tell you that I am okay.

I am trying
to let you believe
that I am consisting out of sunshine,
that there aren't darker days.

But I am not that good
at hiding anymore.
So turn your head away,
shut your eyes,
don't look at this part of me.

I swear;
you are looking to closely.