A Hamilton Runaway

Disappear

"WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL US?! WE COULD'VE HELPED YOU!!" Oak yelled tears streaming down his face. I bite back a sob and looked around everyone was looking at me like I was a piece of trash. I couldn't take it anymore so I did what I do best.
                   Disappear.

1 hours before.

I was shaken awake by Leslie.

"Hey Snowflake? The cast is here and they want to know." I sighed and looked up. In fact the whole cast was here and non of them were smiling.

Why were they all so serious? Did Renee and Leslie tell them. I shot a glance at them and saw guilt all over.

No. They wouldn't. But they wouldn't meet mg eyes. I felt an emotion that I haven't felt in awhile. Betrail.

"Look, I'm sorry for not telling you sooner but I just try not to think about it. I try so hard to forget that past, that it kinda slipped my mind. I was born in Orlando.." Iwent on and told them all what I told Leslie and Renee.

When I finished I saw everyone with tears going down there face.

"Your holding something back. What?" I looked towards Pippa and saw that she was staring right at me. I held a calm stance but my eyes were on fire.

"I'm not I told you everything." I lied straight through my teeth. I didn't tell them about my surgery. I couldn't.

"Yes. You. Are. Stop lying and just tell us already." She said her patience running thin. I looked at the clock. I've been talking for a hour.

I held back gears as I looked around and the words started to come back.

"Freak."

"Weirdo."

"Faker."

"Pity project."

"When I was 13, i suffers from so many things. Anorexia, depression, and PTSD. Name it I had it. I was very broken. My mom was not helping one bit and my brothers started to drink. I was only 13. So when they took me to a party, seeing as my mom was away for awhile. There was drinking and I drank. I drank so much to forget my pain. Well let's just say someguys took advantage and- and- and-" I stirred looking at my hands. I couldn't say it. I  can't say those words.

"What happened? We need to know so we can help you." Chris said coming over. He put his arms around me but I didn't move. I felt so disgusting, lile i shouldn't deserve to be here. That i should be on the streets. I was so lost in thought that the words just flowed out.

"You guys remember when I mentioned a little cousins Amelia right?" I asked. Everyone nodded there heads.

"Well she wasn't my cousin. She is my daughter. That Night I was raped. Well the next 8 7months were living hell. I couldn't move, due to my anorexia. I was bed ridden until I had her. Well let's just say that didn't go well. I almost died and she almost died. I went to the hospital a few weeks before my mom came home and found out that if I had one more child I would die or the child will die. I didn't care. I came home and gave Amelia to my cousin. Ever since then everyone has called her mini me." I finished. I looked up and everyone was looking at me sadly. I decided to add to their grief.

"That's not all. My anorexia got so bad that I fainted often. My depression So bad that I had a camera installed in my room. I was so emotionless that even my brothers looked at me as though I were a zombie. I just gave up. I still fell like it but I know that you guys care for me. At least I think." I said. Everyone nodded their heads.

"But why didn't you tell us sooner?" Lin asked placing his hand on my knee. I shurrged my shoulders.

"No I want a real answer. Please?" He asked. I shook my head no. I saw everyone tense up as their patience started run thin.

"We need an answer. Now." Daveed asked. I looked up at everyone and saw theirs eyes hard. I gulped and felt Chris leave my side. Leslie and Renee got up and went with the cast and looked at me with hard eyes. I felt detrayed all over again.

I shook my head no and the person I least expected blew up.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL US?! WE COULD'VE HELPED YOU!!" He blew up. That doused a train reacting as everyone else started to blow up. Except Lin, Anthony, and Jazzy they stood up and tried to call everyone.

I shrunk back I fear before thing to myself.

They never cared. I was a pity project. I was a freak. Not was AM a freak. And that's all I ever will be. I'm going to do everyone a favor.

I jumped up grabbed my bag and ran downstairs. I heard yells behind me and a few footsteps. I ran out the stage door, down the stairs and into the street. I heard yelling as the cast came out. I continued to run until the yelling faded. Even then I ran. I ran until I couldn't run and them kept on running.

I finally stopped in front of a cemetery. I have no idea why but I went In. I walked around until I saw something.

"Well well well, I found you at last hu." I said sitting down. It was a grave for Snowflake Laurens. I sat there for awhile before I just started to talk.

"I have no idea what I'm doing bit I'm going to give it a shot. I'm Snowflake. Just like you. I'm going through a lot right now. I have no idea what your saying but if you can hear me help me out. My family is mad at me cause I didn't tell them my past. I feel betrayed by my parents since they have my past away. I thought I could trust them but in reality I can't trust anyone it seems. My anorexia and depression is hitting me like a truck. I stopped eating and I feel emotionless. But you did everything that I can't do. You played a boy to fight in the revolution and at the same time a girl. You waited forever for Hamilton to realise that you loved him. And yet you didn't break down. You lost your brother, your only family that you truly loved and didn't break down. How did you do all that while I can't even get over there death. How?!" I yelled as fresh tears started again. I heard footsteps and some e sit down next to me.

I looked up to see the one person I don't want to see right now. Leslie.

"What?" I spat out. I was not in the mood.

"I'm sorry, but they pushed into telling them." He said not looking at me.

"Oh so they push you and you give in. How much of a fight did you put up? None I know. Do know how i know? Cause no one cares about my. It's always had been and always will be Snowflake and no one else. That's how cruel the world is. I should never even ran away. I should be dead right now."

"Don't say that. It's not true. Everyone is so sorry but they were all times off seeing as your mother just sent a letter. And no we haven't read it yet." He said pulling me into a hug. I didn't hug b.s. k het didn't pull away.

"You would've like my dad Leslie. He was silent yet loud. He was weak why strong. He wasn't scared of anything. Except my mom. He was kind and so caring. He always have decoy d chances to everyone. I guess I get that from him." I said finally hugging him back. He nodded his head and pulled out only to dry my tears.

"Leslie. I still want to go to Orlando. This can't ruin the trip. I want to have fun with you guys but my demons stop me. I have so many that I can't count anymore. But everyday I spend with you guys makes it a little easier. I really didn't mean for anyone to get mad. I just, I, i just needed so.eti.e to gain your trust because so have been tricked so many times that it hurts to trust. I'm sorry." I said putting my head in my hands.

I felt Leslie wrap me in blanket seeing as I was shivering. I was only out here in a t-shirt and shorts.

"Come back home. Everyone had cooled down. They just blew up cause your mother as you know. They truly are sorry. But if you want we can go somewhere. As long as we are packed and ready to go in two days." He said trying to change the subject. I smiled and got up. He got up and we walked towards the car.