A LITTLE MORE COMPLICATED

18 | adultery, concubinage and sexual infidelity

“Adultery is committed by any married woman who shall have sexual intercourse with a man not her husband and by the man who has carnal knowledge of her knowing her to be married, even if the marriage be subsequently declared void,” Thirdy lectured while skimming through his codal of the Revised Penal Code.  “On the other hand, Concubinage is committed by any husband who shall keep a mistress in the conjugal dwelling, or, shall have sexual intercourse, under scandalous circumstances, with a woman who is not his wife, or shall cohabit with her in any other place, shall be punished by prision correccional in its minimum and medium periods.”

“Ano daw ‘yun?” Julie whispered to Pia.

I gave Julie a nudge to keep quiet. 

Pia faked a cough.  “Nosebleed.” 

Thirdy invited these two to have merienda with our study group.  We ended up having cake at Chocolate Kiss.  I couldn’t really tell if Pia and Julie were bored or amused but they seemed to be enjoying their cakes.  But one thing was for sure, Thirdy was ecstatic that he even offered to pay for our merienda.  Pasalamat sya at dalawang Maroons lang ang nasagap nya… mamumulubi sya kung sakali. 

“Adultery and concubinage are crimes concerning sexual behavior… having sex with another person not your spouse. Adultery is committed when a wife sleeps with another man who knows that she is married,” Thirdy explained.  “Concubinage is committed by a husband who takes a mistress who knows him to be married.”

‘Langya! Talagang nag-explain pa sa dalawa.  Thirdy who was seated next to Pia had this big smile that couldn’t be erased.

“If the wife has an affair with another woman, will that still be adultery?” Pia blurted out.  "Or when the husbad has an affair with another man."

“Good point!” Thirdy exclaimed.  “It is not adultery or concubinage as defined by the Revised Penal Code.” 

“Dapat na talagang amyendahan yung batas para burahin ‘yung adultery at concubinage sa Penal Code,” Laya empathically said.  “Masbigat ‘yung parusa para sa adultery habang ‘yung kabit sa concubinage ay hindi makukulong kung ‘di destierro lang.”

“At ang daling patunayan ng adultery kung ikumpara sa concubinage,” I agreed with Laya.  “A wife commits adultery just by having sex with another man.  But a husband does not commit concubinage just for having sex with another woman, unless he does it under scandalous circumstances.  Seriously? If you are a husband, it must be scandalous to be punishable? Otherwise, it is legal?”

“It is an antiquated law.  Archaic,” Thirdy commented.  “1920’s pa yung orginal draft ng Revised Penal Code.”

Of course Jay disagreed.  “But consider this, when the illicit relations produced a child the legal husband will not be able to know that he is rearing , caring and supporting a child that is not his own. Without the husband knowing about the adultery, he will think that the child is his own.  He will support the child’s education and love the child just like his other children.  Under our Civil and Family Laws, any child born during the marriage is considered the legitimate child of the husband.  The child that resulted from the adulterous relationship will also be carrying the name of the husband instead of his biological father.  This is the logic that the law contemplates that is why the penalty against a woman committing adultery is more severe.  There was no scientific means then like DNA sampling to prove paternity at that time when the Revised Penal Code was enacted.”

“Kung ‘yung lalaki, sustentuhan ang kabit at anak nya sa labas, kawalan pa din ‘yun sa dapat mapupunta sa legal nyang pamilya,” Laya argued.  “At kung mamatay sya, ang anak sa labas ay kabahagi din ng mga legitimate na anak sa hatian ng ari-arian.”

It was always entertaining to watch these two disagree.  I just wish for Jay when they both become lawyers that he’ll not find himself at the opposing side against Laya.

“Pag ang lalaki nag-uwi ng anak nya sa ibang babae, hindi nya ito maitatago.  Baka mapatay pa sya ng asawa nya.  Pero kayang kaya ng babae palabasin na anak ng asawa nya kahit anak ng iba,” Jay smirked. 

“Question,” Julie raised her hand. 

Everyone turned to Julie who flashed an innocent smile.  That stopped Laya and Jay momentarily.

“A woman who has an affair with a married man is a concubine; while a married woman who has an affair with another man is an adulterer.  What do call a married man who has a mistress and a man who has an affair with a married woman?” Julie asked.

“Maswerte?” Thirdy kidded, trying to display his sense of humor to no avail.

“Makapal ang mukha,” I added.

“Manloloko,” Laya jested and took a quick look at Jay. 

“Paramour,” Jay plainly said, taking a sip of his coffee.

“But isn’t paramour a generic term for an illicit lover of a married person? Pwedeng babae o lalaki,” Julie replied.  Even Julie got a point against Jay.  Though Jay didn’t really care… or maybe he didn’t quite get it. 

“Makikita talaga natin ang pagkakaiba ng pagturing hindi lang ng batas pati ng lipunan mismo sa babae at lalake.  Mapanghusga at mapagkutya ang mga salitang mistress at concubine.  Samantalang katangap-tanggap ang pagkakaruon ng kabit ng isang lalake,” Laya explained, while Pia and Julie seemed to have been drawn to the topic.

“Wala naman kasing mawawala sa lalaki,” Jay desperately argued.

“The law should not distinguish between the infidelity of a man from the infidelity of a woman,”  I butted in.  “After all, they said the same marriage vows and the wife is not any less betrayed by the unfaithful husband than a husband whose wife broke her vows.”

Thirdy, who looked absolutely smitten with Pia, declared, “Ang alam ko, ikaw lang ang una at huling mamahalin ko sa buhay kong ito.”

“Momsie, may sayad yata ito,” Pia pointing to Thirdy.

Laya tapped Thirdy on the shoulder.  “Tama na ‘yan.  Tinatakot mo ‘yung bata.  Gusto mo yatang ma-7610.”

Everyone laughed as Thirdy scratched the back of his head.