Bouquet of Rose's

The Beginging of the End

Rosalina

This isn't supposed to be happening to me.

I truly felt as if I was transported into an alternate reality. I felt angry tears rolling down my face, as the dam inside of me broke.

My heart was cut into a thousand pieces and it was all because of him. I cursed myself for being drawn to him. Feeling as though we were meant for each other. As if fate actually gave you what you wanted.

Our love was false and felt like a slap to the face. The only good thing to come from us was Jai'Dence. My son was nothing to regret, but his father. I could just spit in his face.

My leg bounced quickly, as I sat in the living room. Rolling our entire relationship over in my mind. It was getting late, and I'm sure I would be found soon. I kept the lights dimmed real low, hoping I would be overlooked.

How could I fall so easily for a man with no regard for my feelings. He didn't love me. How could love ever feel like this.

3 years of loving Jamir, turned out to be my vice. He use to be my sanctity. The only light at the end of all I've been through. I felt a sob creeping out, and hugged myself tightly. I was supposed to be mad, but I felt as though I was grieving.

That chance meeting in a hallway felt like destiny. Surely it was. Our families were intertwined from the start, no matter if we lost that part of our childhood. My heart belonged to him once his mother gave her life for mine.

Knowing that only brought us closer. Just to be separated again. The fear I felt during that time seemed foolish now. I stormed inside the belly of the beast, with no regard for my own life. All to help save the very man that caused me such happiness and pain. My fiancé.

I moved my arm from around my torso. Bringing my left hand to my eyes, as I gazed at the ring. "I don't want to lose you. . . This ring is my promise that, that will never happen again." He said to me once. Sounding as if he was sincere in that claim.

He had no right to promise such a thing. I wondered if I was truly done with him as I continued to gaze at the ring, through tear streaked eyes. I couldn't bare to remove it. Despite my emotions at the moment. I still loved him.

I had saved him that day. ShaMilla and I. I faced my own fears, and we were successful. I had an entire year filled with Joy at his side. Jamir was all mine and I his. Nothing in these 24 years of life could compare to that. Nothing.

That year was too short, and I was taken against my will. With only my hope for rescue to keep me sane, and my child. I endured 6 months of captivity. Waiting for him, and he never came for me. He was too busy killing in my name.

I kissed my teeth. Shaking my head at the irony. Where was he when I needed him most. WE needed him most.

Seeing him in the hotel with Jai'Dence clouded my mind. Too anxious to be with them again, I ignored the signs. His remorse, and his voice soaked in regret. I should have listened to the betrayal then.

Now here I am broken. Damaged by the unveiling of everything. My rehearsal dinner was a joke. I couldn't bare to allow her to steal my shine. She had everything else already.

To see him so concerned for her wellbeing, when I didn't have any during my time of need. The sight filled me with more than rage. Jealousy coursed through me as well. How could he put me in such a position.

I heard the door open then. Followed by heavy footsteps coming my way, but pausing just at the opening for the living room. I didn't acknowledge his presence at all. I kept my eyes on my ring, as fresh tears cascaded down my cheeks.