Special girl

10

Those tears reminded me of a moment in my life.

I was in college I was also in tears but this time its about family and my feeling of worthlessness and uselessness.

I never told a soul but there was a moment that I wanted to lessen pain inside I actually went looking for a blade I couldn't find a cutter so I went to kitchen grab knife and took it with me in my room. I tried slicing my wrist but the knife isn't sharp enough no one has sharpen it for years it wouldn't cut I went back to kitchen to look for another knife but there isn't one sharp enough that I could draw blood with one swipe. I gave up and cried and cried.

I'm not really trying to kill myself but I wanted to hurt physically to lessen the pain in my heart to punish myself for being so useless.