Bughead• Love has its set backs

Blank nothing

Jugheads POV
A blank nothing. That's how I feel. It's like I'm in this void that goes on forever and ever. Like I'm never going to get out. Every time something bad happens I sink further and further into the void of darkness. I know I'm in the hospital room, but through all the chaos I just sit there. I don't hear anything, I don't feel anything. I just sit there and look at the wall. Thinking. I'm so confused. I wonder why that I couldn't just die back at the tree house. Then Betty wouldn't of been shot. Then she could've ended up going to Archie. She knows that he was a rapist. But that was a while ago, knowing Betty she'll forgive him and the end up marrying him. But now she's probably dead all because of me. This is all my fault. I'm an idiot who deserves to die a slow painful death. I begin to cry again. Knowing that the one person I loved is probably dead because I decided to take my own life. Even if she is alive she'll probably hate me and end up with Archie. This just proves that they're meant to be together. They were practically made for each other. The perfect girl next door, and the boy next door. She's too good for the sad boy from the wrong side of the tracks. It's all my fault. I practically killed her. If I didn't try to kill myself she wouldn't even be here. I back up in to the darkest corner of my bed and sob. I sob for hours. That's all I do in this room.