Him // Lip Gallagher

chapter three

"Everything's gonna be okay."

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I awoke to the bright sun rays shining through the window. I opened my eyes, finally reaching full consciousness. 

I pulled myself out of Lip's bed, walking over to the dresser that still contained mine and Carl's clothes. I opened the top drawer and pulled out a black long sleeved crop top, a pair of fishnet tights, and a pair of ripped jeans, along with some clean undergarments. I also grabbed a pair of black combat boots from Debbie's room.

I went into the bathroom and showered, then got ready afterwards.

After getting dressed and putting on my makeup, I trotted down the stairs to the kitchen. Oddly, no one was in there. I shook my head, doing my best to brush off the anxiety that washed over me. 

I pulled my phone from my pocket and hopped up onto the kitchen counter, scrolling through Instagram. 

I came across a picture of Carl from the local news channel; his mug shot. I instantly got goosebumps. I then read the caption under the photo.

"Local resident of Canaryville, Chicago, Carl Gallagher out of police's custody and headed to military school." 

Instant panic washed over me. I started to shake, hyperventilating as tears stung my eyes. I began to have a panic attack. 

-

After I had calmed down, I decided to make myself something to eat. I made some waffles and made myself a cup of coffee. 

As I ate at the kitchen table, I started to think out loud to myself. 

"Maybe he's going there to get his shit together. Maybe when he comes back, we can talk things over. Maybe the drugs fucked him up. What if he really did love me?", I muttered to myself as an instant wave of sadness rushed over me. Even after all he had done to me, I still loved him.

-

As I was escorted onto the bus that would transport me to military school, I looked out the window at my family who had come to see me off. Even Lip showed up, which surprised me.

I had only been using cocaine for a few weeks, so I wasn't that addicted. I just quit cold turkey because I wanted to get my shit together. 

In all honesty, I really did love Lexie. But after I started using, all I cared about was how I was going to get my next dose.

In court, I was given the choice of prison or military school. I obviously chose military school. I wanted to get my shit straight and I knew they'd fix me up there. I'd only be here for six months. I could get through this.

I wanted to get better for Lexie. I needed her. 

I waved to my family as the bus took off towards the school. I shoved my hand in my jacket pocket, fidgeting with the ring I had proposed to Lexie with.

-

I finished eating and put my plate and coffee mug in the sink. I walked towards the front door, deciding to go on a walk to clear my head.

I stepped over the threshold of the front door out onto the porch. I bounded down the couple steps and onto the sidewalk. 

As I walked, I pulled a cigarette from the pack I had taken off the table as I left the house. I lit it with the lighter I had always carried with me. 

-

I ended up just walking around the block a few times before heading back home. Once arriving, I opened the front door and stepped inside. Still, no one was home. I shrugged my shoulders, slamming the front door. 

I walked through the living room to the kitchen table. I sat down in one of the chairs and folded my arms on the table, flopping my head down on them. 

Soon enough, my eyes drooped closed, sleep washing over me.

-

I woke up to someone gently shaking my shoulder. I lifted my head up, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes with the heels of my hands. I glanced up, seeing that it was Fiona who had woken me up. 

"Oh, hey, Fi", I smiled, sitting up fully. "Hey, kiddo", she said softly, pulling out the chair next to me and sitting down. "So I'm guessin' you heard about Carl?", she asked, a hint of sadness in her voice.

I nodded, frowning. "I don't even know why I still love him. After all the shit he put me through, he still has me wrapped around his finger", I sighed, shaking my head. 

Fiona gently rubbed my back, sighing a little. "He wanted me to tell you that he's sorry. He knows sorry won't fix what he did, but he still loves you. The whole thing about you bein' a bet was a lie. He just told his friends that because he wanted the money. The money that he was given was used to buy your engagement ring. He wasn't gonna leave you at the altar", she said. 

My eyes welled up with tears. I didn't know what to say, so I just sat there. Fiona pulled me in for a hug, tightly wrapping her arms around me. I wrapped my arms around her, crying onto her shoulder. 

"Everything's gonna be okay",  she said softly, gently rubbing my back.

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