The Boy In My Head

12

Aline is standing in the kitchen with her arms crossed over her body. Her lips are pressed into a thin line, and she's glaring at Will. "I was just helping her clean up from spilling juice all over her," Will explains. "You've got to be kidding me," Aline says. "They were totally making out," Trish says. "We were not!" I defend, although what I really want to do is disappear. I can't believe this is happening to me. I look around the room quickly, and everyone has stopped to watch the scene. It's not just people in the kitchen; everyone in the living room is looking on now, too. "What are you even doing here, Rachel Brooks ?" Aline snarls at me. She pronounces my name as if it's poison in her mouth. I freeze. There are so many eyes on me right now. "I—uh." My quick breathing makes it hard to spit out my words. I choke on them. "Your announcement said anyone was invited." The lump rising in my throat causes my explanation to come out as a mere whisper. "You didn't actually think that meant you , did you?" I open my mouth to speak, but I don't know what to say.

"News flash," Aline says, "it didn't. I don't invite losers to my parties." I'm keenly aware of all the other eyes on me, but I'm not sure if Aline is. If she was, would she be saying such hurtful things and risk her chance at homecoming court? Or is this the kind of thing people like about her? I can't imagine why they would. Tears threaten at my eyes. "Okay," my voice cracks, and I hate myself for letting that happen. It only shows my weakness. I don't dare open my mouth again. I turn to leave, but Aline doesn't seem like she's finished yet. "If your loser boyfriend P.J. is here, you better take him with you." I ball my hands into fists and want to turn back and smack her in the face, but I don't have the courage. I can't even turn back to correct her on J.P.'s name. Instead, I push through the crowd and rush toward my bike. "Rachel," a voice calls behind me. "Rachel." It's catching up. I grip onto my bike's handlebars and swing the kickstand up with my foot. Strong hands grip around my shoulders. I try to push them away with a single hand, but I only start crying instead. I turn to see who chased me, and I find Will standing over me once again. "Come to make fun of me, too?" I ask with vengeance in my voice. "What? No," he says, his eyes shifting between each of mine. "I just wanted to make sure you're okay. What Aline said was really insensitive. If she didn't want everyone to come, she shouldn't have invited everyone. I just want you to know that we're not all like that." I tear away from him and push my bike forward, swinging my leg over the seat. "Come on, Rachel," Will says. "You can't ride home in just your swimming suit. I'll give you a ride." "I don't want a ride," I tell him. I start pedaling to put distance between us. From behind me, I hear him call out again, only I can't be sure of his words. "She only hates you because you're prettier than her."

I get home and still feel completely humiliated. Okay, so I was at her party, but is that any reason for Aline to act so hostile toward me? What does she have against me, anyway? I opt for a hot bubble bath to help me forget about the party. I turn on some peaceful music and let it play softly in my head. A voice cuts through the music. "Are you okay?" It's the same voice as before, and I'm not entirely sure what to make of it. I somehow manage to answer, "No." And then I realize I'm talking to a stranger in my head. "And get out of my head!"